Neglectful Narcissist

[TeaBookcats]

Has anyone else had experience living with a neglectful narcissist? How did you leave? When they saw that they pushed you too far would they have very short periods of being nice and talking to you?

I by no means have the expertise to diagnose someone, however, after much research, it appears that this is what is happening. It's been happening for 6 years and I am a shell of who I was before. I'm in the middle of getting us out of here. I feel like a ghost.

Living with one right now. He is all image management. He cares more about random stranger's feelings than mine. He happily runs me into the ground without a care other than the inconvenience for him.

You're not a ghost. We can all see you, we value you, you deserve to be valued, and we will be here to listen and advise while you get away from this 💕

After years of trying to understand I have just discovered the neglectful narcissist type. Dr Ramini's book It's Not You is amazing. I knew about covert and vulnerable but this. Well this explains everything. But after 30 years I am not sure who I am and what I can do. My now adult children have learned techniques of invalidation and blame shifting so will blame me if I say anything. And I have no where to go and am terrified to be alone. Which is weird, given that i always am.

I’m interested to hear more. Mine virtually ignored me for 10 years, unless he was abusing me for daring to have an opinion or voice of my own. I did feel like the “Echo”… but you can come back to yourself 💐

Narcissists make up 1 percent of the population. We need to stop using that term

Source please? I saw something on bbc breakfast that is a lot higher than that and thought to be way higher, as a narcissist by definition doesn’t think anything is wrong with them hence would rarely get a diagnosis

I don't know about narcissists but abusers do switch from controlling and aggressive to being nice - wanting you to believe it is either all in your head or that they are capable of changing. The fact is, most of them aren't. They mess with your head to gain control.

I left because I am absolutely not exposing my DC to that. He may get shared custody but at least my DC will only be with him some of the time rather than all of it.