Mother problems

[Gettingbysomehow]

My mother abandoned me and left the country when I was 16 to make a new life with my stepfather and his children.
They have had a luxury lifestyle and left me to rot basically.
I've made a life and career for myself out of this mess but now they have come back to this country.
My stepfather is terminally ill and step siblings decided to stay abroad. My mother thinks I will look after them and that I'll be her best friend when he dies.
I'm not feeling generous and don't want anything to do with them.
They have a lot of money, the step siblings have all been treated very generously and I've had nothing but most importantly no love at all.
I don't see why I should should look after an old woman who abandoned me.
I don't have any feelings for her. I longed for a mother and she wasn't there.
Now all my relatives are saying I should forgive and forget which I think is easy for them to say.
She's rich, she can afford a nursing home and carers. I don't see why I should look after her.
What do you think? Am I being mean? I've got so much going on in my head I don't know what to think any more.

I think that you have been treated very badly and that you should live your life as you want, Op.

No. Don’t get involved. You are being used for their care now step siblings are not bothered. Just say no, that will not work for me , shut any conversations down with that. The relatives that are feeling oh so forgiving - they can help, seeing as they have endless supplies of empathy.

You are under no oblilgations here. Protect yourself.

No you shouldn't have to do anything you don't want to do.

The thing that stands out now is the fact that she still isn't offering anything that looks like love. She's lonely but is she still as selfish as she was? That sounds like an abusive friendship at best.

For your own well-being you might want to establish if she feels guilty and would like to acknowledge your loss. But you're perfectly within your rights to avoid her.

Nope nope nope nope nope
My mother was a bitter alcoholic from when I was 12 until she died when I was 36
I had gone no contact with her a few years before
I have no regrets
You owe her nothing

She is your dm in title only. I am nc with my rubbish dm. I won't be caring for her. Or even seeing her whatever her old age holds...
No reason you should honestly op.

I would look at it another way - you dont have Mother issues because shes not your mother. It takes more than to give birth to earn that title mother.

You owe her nothing, let alone a relationship here. Do not get involved with any of them.

I would also cut off any and all flying monkeys who are saying forgive and forget. They have their own agenda and do not have your interests at heart.