No one ever has a nice word to say about me

[palmroyale]

But they have plenty of nice things to say about everyone else.

I think the issue stems back to my childhood. My parents always preferred my sister, cousins and their friends children so would say gushing things about them all the time, compare me to them unfavourably and say nasty things about me.

All through life I've just had 'friends' who gush about other people, compliment other people, but never have a nice word to say about or to me.

I thought I'd made a decent friend at work but recently when a colleague said something nasty and piss taking about me, said friend absolutely fell about laughing. So clearly she's not much of a friend either.

I got bullied at school and a teacher said I was the most unpopular girl she'd ever known, so I'm always wary of making my feelings known to people or speaking up for myself as I can't fall out with everyone.

I know how you feel, honestly, and it's partly because you're so tuned into every comment and waiting for a reason to reject people before they hurt or reject you.

You probably already know this.

I find that reminding myself of this helps so I can work at shrugging off 80% of perceived hurtful comments and rationalise what is really happening.

It isn't easy.

Someone once said to me that I expected people to be perfect and in reality it's true. Do you do that?

It's easier said than done but try and work through the temptation to withdraw and reject and you'll see things carrying on fine and this will help you get a better perspective.

Your parents were pricks.

Either you carry this around OP or you decide to break the chain

Do something extreme, get a job overseas, cruise ship anything. Move.

Move and live.

Don't look back

OP - sorry about bullying. And maybe your parents did have a favourite, and that it painful.

However - it is unlikely that the whole world is united in being nasty to you.

It is much more likely that the issue is with your perception of human interactions.

Or, maybe, something in the way you come across/connect to people is turning them off.

Have you tried to investigate that in counselling?

I can relate to some things, i always felt unfavourably compared to my sister, she was slimmer, more outgoing and popular. To this day i struggle with compliments and am wary it’s a pisstake but im much better than i was before.

I did what @frozendaisy suggests, moved far away from everyone and at the age of 43 i am happy with the way i am, not perfect but im ok with my imperfections.

You are conditioned to pick up the negativity, try to catch yourself doing that and remind yourself that you are a good person. When you put yourself down, that’s all those crappy ppl you’ve met talking. You are not that.
That teacher was really shitty too, who says that to a child. It says a lot about them as a person. Sadly, crappy ppl get to be teachers and leave marks like that on kids too. Being aware when you interpret things in a negative way due to your experiences might help.

A wise person once said to me, "Everyone is insecure". The people bullying you, they do it because they're insecure and regard you as an easy 'target'. I agree with PP, break the chain of horrible parents etc and move on to a new place. It's not you, it's them.