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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DP blatant attraction to colleague?

1 reply

plsdontlookatme · 05/05/2024 15:45

Hello,
Name changed for this but have been around for a few years. Would be really grateful for some views and experiences on this.

DP and I, both mid-20s, living together, no kids. Last week a new employee started at his work, a woman in her mid-20s. She was hired by one of the owners who has form for hiring younger women he (the owner) finds attractive, rather than making sensible appointments based upon experience and skills.

Anyway DP is partially responsible for training the new employee, and has been doing so this week. When we are chatting about work, I have noticed that he "adjusts himself" every time he mentions her in passing. I have tried to tell myself otherwise, but it's beginning to make me feel physically sick and I'm increasingly unable to appear nonchalant. He has also been messaging me much less this week, and seems to have more pent-up sexual energy than usual.

Am I being nuts? Am I being unfair? Is this part and parcel of being in a relationship? I would love to be a cool girl, believe me, but I'm feeling really unwell. Happy to be told that I'm nuts. Thanks in advance.

OP posts:
AnonAnonmystery · 05/05/2024 16:03

I don’t think you are nuts… 9 times out of 10 if you notice a change in your partner, the observation and reason behind it is valid.
You know him more than anyone else.
Feeling insecure shouldn’t be part and parcel in a relationship but I think everyone has periods of this whether it be unfounded or not.

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