I've got these two friends who I met when we were all 18/19 but they along with another girl who we went out with (who has moved away and only sends Xmas and birthday cards now) were all friends from primary school and I always felt the outsider. I told them this when we were much older and they said they didn't realise that and it wasn't true anyway as they never saw me like that. That was probably stemming from my own insecurities growing up.
Now we have grown up we still see each other though one of them doesn't live locally anymore, we will meet up as a threesome about every month or so depending on other commitments. They're very different characters and also quite different to me, I'm the most gregarious of them one is the most sensible and the other is more reserved and quieter. We do sort of understand one another better now we are older and when I meet them independently - the local one I am helping with some work matters for instance - things are usually good. It's when we are all together that things change and they seem to in a subtle way gang up on me. They will have a bit of a pop disguised as teasing. I really don't like teasing in any way.
On Saturday I wore a sequin jacket. It was freezing cold and I didn't have a jacket with me but found this in the car. It is a dull silver sequin jacket a sort of biker jacket style, I chucked it on as I walked from car to bar, about 20 steps and then took it off when I got there. It wasn't full on Strictly glitter ball stuff, I wore it with black trousers and top.
OMG YOU LOOK LIKE GARY GLITTER! was the cry when I walked in. I felt like a fool being compared to a rancid old pervert and I thought it was inappropriate too. I doubt Gary Glitter shops at Mint Velvet.
Things like this have happened before, but though I don't think they're being malicious I don't like being the fall girl. They never do it when I see them one on one and they don't do it alongside me to the other one. It's not my style. Comments on me wearing high heels or making a bit of an effort on a Saturday night or wearing a dress or skirt, they wear trousers all the time.
I want to challenge it but I don't want a scene. Do you think they're being mean girls underneath it all or they see it as a bit of fun? They might think we're all such good mates that teasing is a way of building connection. I think I would challenge it by just asking "what do you mean by that?" and not stopping until they tell me why.
WWYD?
No "You sound like a right misery/you sound like a barrel of laughs" comments thank you.