I'm confused about my feelings.

[Motsakingmense]

I am a straight female 34 years old. Always been attracted to men and only ever dated men. Never thought of woman and actually the thought of being with a woman (if it was ever brought up in convo) made me feel uncomfortable. But can fully appreciate the beauty of a woman.

I do believe, to some extent, that all humans can be attracted to the same sex but we all have a preference and obviously in some cases are made to believe the opposite sex is the only way (religion etc, but that's another story), so I'm pretty open minded.

My issue is, I seem to be crushing on a female. She has a kid at the same school as mine, we don't know each other very well but have had some playdates for the kids.
I'm so confused but also not, because of what I said earlier, but the worst thing is, she's married (to a man). Like what do I do with these feelings? I find her really attractive, could picture myself being with her and I don't know why. I would never mention this to her and I would never flirt or anything like that, but I'm obviously a bit confused as I can't do anything about it. I thought it was maybe because I have been single for a long time, but then surely I would just be crushing on man.

Has anyone else had a similar situation? I'm struggling with the feelings and feeling guilty and embarrassed about them but I don't know why. I think it's also the embarrassment feelings that are confusing to me, my family and friends are a mix of different people, LGBTQ+ etc, so it's not like there's any homophobia or anything like that in my family or friendship circle.
I don't know if I should try and date women, but then I don't want to try and date a woman to then realise that it was maybe just one time crush kinda thing and lead anyone on/upset anyone.

Sorry I feel like I just needed to talk about these feelings because they're consuming alot of my mind recently and I'm too scared to bring it up with anyone I know.

Thanks to anyone who reads this :)

I once had an erotic dream about a young woman who lived in my student house at Uni, dont know why I fancied her, just did. I did have a BF at the time.
That's it, end of, did nothing more about it, been with only men ever since, had the odd passing attraction to a woman - rarely. It is what it is, would I want to have a relationship with a woman? Not convinced, simply as I like PIV, which would be missing, Oh and I've tried kissing a couple - which is oddly soft, I think that sealed it, felt different, tender but not sexual.
Anyhow, just because your hormones, pheromones or whatever, at the time, drive an attraction, doesnt mean you have to act on it when inapropriate - as it would be with her, being married.
So what really, it will pass, move on.

Agree with pp wholeheartedly.

I remember once watching a TV show and this women was on it who just oozed sex appeal. I dunno how to describe it. But I found myself thinking I'd absolutely snog her. But that's the only time I've ever experienced anything like that. And I have no interest in fannies whatsoever so there's that xD

It'll be a passing oddity.
No need to jump out of any closets just yet.

Might be wise to take a step back from her for a while though incase it gets weird. And certainly don't go 'try' dating women xD

This sounds absolutely normal. Just don't act on it (because she's married), your feelings will fade over time. It just goes to show we can't rely on our bodies to make decisions for us all the time...they don't know if someone is available or not. If you found yourself in a room with a dozen 'hot' men and women, chances are you'd be physically attracted to some of them. But they may not make the best long term partners.

Thanks for the replies!
I definitely would never act upon the feelings as she is married.
Will probably take a step back until the feeling pass at least.

I think what's more confusing is that I've been on dating apps etc (talking to men) and just don't seem to be enjoying it. I get bored very quick, or the smallest things will put me off them very quickly. It's been almost 7 years that I've been single now, although only 4 years actually being on dating apps, and I just don't seem to be interested. I'll come off for months and then go back on... destined to be single forever 😅

Yeah that's just online dating for you. Irritating. Frustrating. And more often than not, mind numbingly boring.

As long as you give yourself breaks from it.
Think it's a marathon not a sprint. A very long marathon...with lots of dirty great big puddles enroute 😆