Arguing a lot in front of children

[GriddledTurtle]

Me and DH are going through a rough patch. It started in January when I had an ectopic pregnancy. Everything has been so stressful we keep snapping at each other. We have 2 DC (10 and 8), the youngest got upset at the weekend when he heard us arguing and asked us to stop. (The DC were in bed and we thought they couldn’t hear us at the time). He said we are always arguing now when they go to bed and it upsets him because he worries we will get a divorce, which was heartbreaking to hear. We all had a chat and we apologised and agreed to do better.
DC has come home from school today and he has mentioned the arguing to his teacher. What will happen now? Is this a safeguarding thing? Will it matter that we have already agreed to stop getting sidetracked by stress/ frustration and work on making our marriage better again?

Hopefully it will just mean that the school is understanding if he gets upset or loses focus and can support him better. I don't see that it would be a safeguarding issue if there's no violence or aggression. Probably a good wake up call for you both though to really watch how you interact. Good luck.

Sorry OP, I've done safeguarding training and arguing in front of children was brought up as part (not in a major way) of it. If it's raised by anyone, be open and tell them what you've told us. You've realised it's no the ideal thing to do and despite everything, you've discussed together prior to whoever getting in touch (might not happen) and are going to keep it away from DC.

Might be worth having a gentle chat with your DS, telling him things have been a bit stressful, but you're working through it.

As a couple, obviously you need to work out (away from the DC) how you handle this and if, in fact, you can handle it. Rather than arguing, can you openly discuss whatever and try and solve it?

It’s never abusive or violent but can be a bit shouty (on both sides). We used to have big shouty rows when we first got together as teenagers. The last few months we’ve reverted a bit to that. We love each other very much and have been together all of our adult lives. I know we can put things right. I’m just worried that the school will be (understandably) concerned and I’m worried about what happens next. I’ve tried Googling what would happen but it all seems to be around domestic violence which definitely isn’t what’s happening. We are both just being stroppy and immature.