Sister drama

[Thefirstime]

My sister older than me by 4years has always led a full on busy life, drama is always a theme.. we’ve never been too close..

she’s a taker and will always prioritise herself and her needs which I have fallen for many times

she has 2 kids and her hubby isn’t around.. he left.. she’s in a tough spot and I’ve helped where possible.. but there are boundaries, give an inch take a mile otherwise.. lots of guilt and pressure also

im helping with childcare across a day and she’s driving me mad.. wanting more.. usually my mum helps but is away at moment.. I have my own son!!

I should tell you she rushed to get engaged ( the same evening ) when she found out I was.. my husband told/asked my mum and my mum told her..

my family is quite toxic and I like to keep my distance..

How do I keep healthy distance without being too involved or too estranged?? 😂

Learn that 'no' is a complete sentence.

Can you watch Jimmy for the day?
Sure
Oh can you have him over night, somethings come up?
No
But I really want to go to that concert with...
No
But this is important
No
You'd do this if you loved me!
No
But Jimmy wants to see his favourite aunt more!
No
You're letting him down! He needs a happy mummy and a happy mummy needs to date
No
You're such a mean cow
No
Fine, you suck. You won't ever see me again
No

See, not that hard. Don't give in to emotional bullshit. They soon get the message and get bored.

First post covers it

@StrawberryWater 😂

Cease assisting her. She continually relies on you and your family's support.

She's not the first single parent, and she won't be the last. Let her handle her own affairs. There are numerous resources available for her to utilize.

She needs to take responsibility for her decision to have children, especially if her ex-husband isn't contributing. By enabling her, you're allowing her to take advantage of you. Prioritize your own needs and those of your sons.

If her actions are significantly impacting your mental health, consider cutting her off temporarily or permanently if necessary.

Unless her children are in danger, refrain from involvement and only report it to authorities if necessary.

She sounds very self absorbed.

Unfortunately there is one of those in every family.

Say no. Do not let her use you or guilt trip you into saving her in her adulthood.

I’ve made the mistake of saying yes for the day to have the kids and now she’s all over it.. I’ve pushed back and said for a few hours / let’s see what she says!!