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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

what is the nicest thing a romantic partner has done for you?

80 replies

BrickPoet · 06/04/2024 23:09

bought me flowers

OP posts:
Honeybunzz · 09/04/2024 06:13

I am currently seeing someone and have been for a few years (we have been best friends for 10+ years and began to date), and he had moved abroad to live due to work. I was missing him terribly and he was vocal in saying how much he missed me too. I had planned a night out with my friends (something I had booked around 6 months before and mentioned to my friend) and I got to the venue with my friends and headed to the bar to grab a drink - I felt someone hold my hand, and when I turned around it was him 🥹 He was standing there smiling with my drink of choice in his hand. I couldn’t believe it. We broke down in tears and hugged. He flew back a few hours earlier as he was missing me and knew I would be at the event. He was only due to be back in town for a week before heading back to the other country - however the day of the flight back home; he couldn’t do it and didn’t return. We are still together and I still treasure that moment.

Helpimfalling · 09/04/2024 09:16

vidflex · 07/04/2024 20:18

I'd been seeing my now dh for nearly a year before I let him come to my home. I'd left an abusive relationship a couple of years before and my ex was still financially abusing me (suddenly refusing to have the dc when he knew I had to work). My house had no carpets downstairs and I was sleeping on a rickety sofa. He never once judged me and tried to help with bits of diy. He bought my dc and I tickets to a theme park one weekend and dropped us there then said he couldn't stay as he had something come up at work. He picked us up in the evening and took us home. I walked in to my newly carpeted living room that had all new furniture and he'd also bought me a bed and wardrobe for my bedroom. I was speechless.

He moved in a year after that. We celebrate 25 years together this week. 😍.

He's still the most caring selfless man I've ever met. The absolute love of my life

My heart ❤️

Starlight1979 · 09/04/2024 13:45

Sat by my mum's bedside in the hospice with me, day in, day out until she died. He literally gave up everything in his own life for over 2 weeks to be there for me. We had only been together about 10 months at this point and he'd only met my mum a handful of times yet he treated her like his own parent. Holding her hand, talking to her, cleaning her face, making sure she was comfortable, putting her favourite shows on the tv... He didn't make a fuss, he sat in the background when all my (massive) family arrived for visiting, he made all my elderly relatives tea and coffee and went and picked up food to keep us going. Never have I seen anyone act in a way that is so caring, loving and selfless. I knew during those two weeks that was it forever for me.

questiona · 09/04/2024 15:43

It was a really shitty period in my life and I was largely self-medicating with alcohol, so I was a complete mess. I'd promised DP I'd cut down, but the moment he left town, I called up an old friend and we went out drinking all night. The next morning I felt so, so, so terrible; not just hungover and disappointed in myself but also extremely guilty as I felt I'd let DP down. Possibly the worst I've ever felt, as it was layered on top of all the other shit going on in my life, an I had no one to blame but myself.

I called him in tears to "confess" and thought he'd get angry (my ex certainly would have), but instead he was so kind and sympathetic. We were supposed to get a puppy a few days later, but DP drove down that same day to pick him up and brought him home early to cheer me up.

I'm sure some people in the addiction community would say that this was "enabling" me, or even rewarding me for drinking. Or that what he should've done instead was set a boundary, express his disappointment firmly but kindly, show me some tough love, etc.

But I will forever be grateful that he chose to be gentle and loving instead. I think he realised that I felt bad enough as it was, and that in that moment I needed love, not a life lesson.

FWIW, I'm much better now and we're getting married soon - and the puppy is now getting into middle age!

Smokeysgirl · 09/04/2024 16:13

@questiona So pleased to hear you are in a better place now. Sometimes you punish yourself enough and don't need other people to have a go too, that can actually push you over the edge and make things worse. So glad your dp did something nice for you instead.

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