Friends tight with money

[Sandy8765]

I have an ongoing issue with friends expecting me either to pay for them or if we split bill me to pay more, im far from a push over so its not that, i work for myself & i think they think im loaded but im not but i can be generous & people are taking advantage, examples are
...friend wanting to go to cinema but asking me to book so she didnt have to pay
...cinema with another friend who didnt pay me
...i drove a friend to a festival & we got there , sgr said oh i havnt got cash to pay the petrol
...i organise weekends away etc for friends & they pay late with lots of nagging

I could go on and on, im now no longer giving anyone a lift in my car which people are pissed off about & im not booking anything unless they have paid me first but the final straw today was friend who wanted to go to cinema but asked me to book it, then didnt pay me as she said she would, so i nagged her & she said ' well you could have booked it anyway'! And i thought why do i have to book it?

Seriously people what is this about, they are good friends but they are all taking the P*

Yes we pay at the venue now. But thats awkward as she ages dithering with the purse!! But that way Im not out of pocket.

I'm kind hearted with people. For example, If I've bought something online and it doesn't fit I'll give away to a friend rather than look for money. I've literally taken things out of the wrapper and if they don't fit I've given them away there and then to whoever's there at the time. I hate, however, people who try and take advantage of me. It'll happen once, and if they don't make amends, they don't get a second chance whatsoever.

You are a pushover.

You say I will book after you have transferred the money and then you just don’t book until that happens. If it doesn’t happen it doesn’t get booked, then you will find out who actually likes you.

Well I wouldn’t bother with them anymore as they’re not good friends. But if you don’t want to completely stop, then next time say “my phone is acting up, you book them this time”.

Having a friend that's tight is one thing, having several 'friends' that are always trying to get you to pay is another. They aren't friends, they are freeloaders.

Yeah that is tight. With cinema tickets, if I'd booked them once I'd ask the friend to do it next time, or I wouldn't go.

I’ve had to say this to my teens, if you pay, ask for half back. Tends to happen with ticketed events like concerts and cinema, not with eating as you buy your own. If they don’t pay you then message them and ask. Some people are genuine grifters, I loathe them.

My sister is like this. Never offers to pay then be the one we transfer money to and when anyone else pays she either doesn't pay or pays after loads of chasing up. If it's a family think and my Mum has paid she never pays whereas me and my other sister always do. Now I either take cash with me for my share or say ill transfer it to her so she can pay before she has chance to shirk the bill.

I wouldn't even take only deposits for a hol as when someone drops out others will need to pay more. Just ask for payment in full and people being clear if they drop out they lose their money unless they can find someone to take their place.

I don't think I'd go on holiday with people who see me as a cash machine on legs. The sort of people who need to be forced to pay in full at the beginning are also the sort to whinge and most at the cost of food, activities, rooms etc when on the actual holiday making it less of an enjoyable activity for everyone else. Also I'd hate them "selling" their portion of a holiday to someone I didn't know or like. 🌹

No excuse with Revolut now. My friend is v tight. I just stick to coffee. If cinema I race ahead lol. She usually fumbling for the purse.

But that works for the others involved also? I usually offer (and prepared to hand over cash) to whoever is driving me to/from somewhere as it's making it easier for me plus usually cheaper than paying for sometimes multiple forms of public transport. 🌹

You've just summed up my father

He's minted-nice house,motorbike (paid in cash) my mother has a lovely car (ditto) nice holidays aboard a few times a year,healthy bank account etc

I used to be a on-the-bones-of-my-arse single parent

Every single penny was budgeted for and I often had to turn pennies into pounds

Anyway,we where in town one day and i bought something that was £2.55 (i think it was something for one of the kids-his grandchild) and I had a £10 note (and £2 in a coin) that I didn't want to break into for the sake of 5p so I asked if he'd mind lending me the 5p

His face! But to his credit,he did open his wallet and handed it over

I'd genuinely forgotten about it by the following week,when I met up with him again

He asked me for it!

5p-i was told I was lucky he hadn't charged interest (I would have told him where to go)

I always paid my own way,no way would I have taken the piss but for fuck sake,5 whole English pennies...

Guess that's how he stays rich

@Sharontheodopolodous

That's really beyond tight though? I'd wonder whether he or your mother love or respect you and your children to treat you this way. Sorry to say that. 🌹

I went nc years ago
She's as bad as he is-shed get me to buy something but 'forget' to pay me back or would slag me off if I dared to ask for my money back
('After all I do for you!it's only £xxx!)

Best thing I ever did but I do laugh over that bloody 5p (£5 I could understand)

I've told that story a few times and had some nod as if I was in the wrong-i would have given it back-id just forgotten all about it

If it had been the other way round,I wouldn't have given a stuff