ExDh wants to send money to DS

[Elledeco]

I divorced DH nearly 5 years ago. He hasn't seen the dc since 2019. No contact, nothing. He was verbally abusive , hugely paranoid and had become addicted to cannabis.
The last time he saw DS he was 8, and he said awful, scary things about me that left DS frightened and confused, so I stopped taking him and ex stopped bothering. DS is now 13 and never, ever asks after ex.
Infact, after 5 years it's like he's forgotten him.
As a single parent in a cost of living crisis I'm struggling, despite working full-time.
So I reached out to the CMS and they contacted ex. He was asked to pay a pitiful amount, but its better than nothing after paying NOTHING for 5 years.
That was January and to date I've received nothing. So I reported him .
Tonight, he's transfered me the whole years amount and asked for DS bank details so he can start paying him directly.
I dont know what to do?
I need money, I have 3 dc with ex, 2 of which are young adults so he won't give them money. I don't want to open the door to him after 5 years no contact, but I am struggling massively.
Any thoughts?

I wouldn't allow this. My DB did it and his DC blew all the money. She's still crap at finances in her 30s. Maybe do as others have suggested and open an account that you can control. Btw, is it the monthly maintenance money he wants to give your DS or additional pocket money?

He's basically back paid? But he still has to give you the massive sum of £30 per month surely? I'm not sure how CMS works.

Either way, no, he can't pay the money directly to Ds. He pays it to you. If he wants to top up CMS payment amounts, and would specifically like that to be DS allowance, fine. Except it should still go through you. And frankly, I'd be dubious - what if you agree to give DS £5 a week because that's what ex has agreed and then he stops paying it and now you have to find this £5 a week?

So he can send it to you and, money permitting, you'll use it for extras for ds. At your discretion.