Knowing You deserve better

[Girlssjustwanttohavefun]

I had an epiphany today and wondered if anyone else had ever had the same experience

I've been in a relationship for nearly 3 years and love him with all my heart. I know he loves me and shows me but I realised today that there are so many things wrong (I've been in therapy for a few months) and that I deserve better. I want him to be better. I think he wants to be but I don't know if he's even capable of it. And I think it just hit me today that love isn't enough and wanting to be with him isnt enough.... So now I'm sat crying in the garage realising I deserve better

It took more than 10 years to understand that I deserved better.
He was "nice person", good father, etc.
It was very hard, I felt so bad, guilty, etc.
I didn't have anyone by my side to listen me, to help me, to advice me. I don't have family in UK.
One day I just realised I don't want to live like that anymore. We are still in divorce process and it's still very difficult but OH MY GOD - I'm feeling muuuuch better.
He will never be the person I want to have next to me.

I'm glad that you freed yourself. My dp has autism and I don't know if it's that for him or if it's other trauma but he has a habit of convincing himself of things he thinks he should be doing rather than actually knowing what he wants or how he feels himself. So I feel extra awful as no matter how much I love him, I don't know if he's capable of giving me what I need emotionally for something he might not even be able to help