Conversations with friends

[tiatea]

Hello all,

My friends and I were having a discussion and one of my male friends said that women are brainwashed to think we don't need a man for anything and we are starting to come to our senses. Because some women realized they have a lot of money or a degree but is single. For years women focused on their careers or themselves a passed up relationships. This is not the first time he has said this and every time I always disagree. He says that a woman should be happy to be with a man who loves them but he doesn't have it all.

I have been with a man who I thought loved me and for 3 years I paid all the bills, did all the cooking, paid for my maintenance, got myself flowers and went without dates because I thought he really loved me. But eventually I got tired never being able to ask him for anything and doing it all on my own. Now that is not the main thing but if my money is tight this month and I'm short with a bill I should be able to ask for what I'm short with.

When I was younger I was ok(sadly) being with a man who gave the bare minimum just to say I had a significant other. Now I just can't deal with it. A couple other guys agreed with what he said but maybe 4 guys disagreed. Like I tried to explain to him you can't love someone and expect them to stay with you just because you love that person. Because at the end of the day love does not pay the bills.

Then he went into this whole thing about hating money because it ruins relationships. If I can take care of all of my needs and pay all of my bills alone. And I get into a relationship with a man who doesn't contribute and I'm struggling but he loves me what the point???

one of my male friends said that women are brainwashed to think we don't need a man for anything and we are starting to come to our senses

🤣🤣🤣 he wishes!

Id say it’s quite the opposite - the declining birth rate is one way to prove that.

What a way to tell everyone you’re a misogynistic twat without actually saying it. He sounds like one of those incel types - can’t get a girlfriend and hates women.

If this male friend is single and has history of a string of failed relationships, his attitude will be why😂
I think perhaps as in your case, some men have adapted only too well to women having stability and means of their own and in that case are happy to sit back and be provided for. Not really getting that when men were main providers, the women didn't sit back and watch them do everything, they worked every bit as hard and more in the home.
But then female gold-diggers have always existed, and now more male ones exist too, which is just down to there being more numbers of women with means. It's up to either sex as individuals to not be taken for a ride, 50/50 effort being the ultimate relationship goal.

I agree with you both I absolutely hate when this topic comes up and we're out. I will never understand or agree with what he says. And yea he is currently single🫢

Essentially, twisting feminism to suit his own agenda.

Women 'not needing men' does not mean, women should be adopting manchildren who expect the women to pay for them.

He's saying he's a loser and women should just accept it.

I can afford my own rent but I'm nor going to pay for a man's share too.

Fuck men who try to use our own growth against us. It's gaslighting bullshit.

And he speaks just like my EX you can not expect a woman to be ok with not receiving anything but love. Love is nice but when I'm in need can I call you? No, but we have love. I don't get it

He sounds very backward in his thinking - he obviously prefers the idea of being able to trap a woman through her dependence on him rather than an equal partnership between two financially independent people. Has he been listening to Andrew Tate by any chance? At some level, this is a man who regards women as less than men or not quite human. Are you sure you want him as a friend?