Autism and love

[Whutwhut]

I'd like to make clear, I'm autistic too but feel love deeply so it isn't a criticism of austistic people at all. I'm just trying to get my head around something

Do any of you with autism or your autistic partners struggle with love or it make them uncomfortable being told how much they are loved?

My daughter is autistic and I suspect I am but I'm not diagnosed. All I see with my daughter is someone who loves too much and too hard.

Been with my partner 8 years, and I think the L word has been said twice in all that time by both of us. It's not something either of us need to hear because it's obvious from the way we both behave and treat each other that the feeling is mutual and appreciated.

It doesn't make me uncomfortable hearing it, it's just completely superfluous. It's like being told "you are tall", "you wear shoes", or "you drink coffee". My reaction is "yes, and?".

I expect Id identify with your daughter lol

My partner of 2 years asked me not to say it. I can show it but they don't want me to say it

I find it uncomfortable. I don't know why. I'm with your partner, showing me is the way to go as words are easy.

Are you able to explain to me why? They couldn't but they don't even say it to their parents so I don't know if it's autism or how they are

Im neurotypical and my partner is autistic,we've been together over 30 years and he still tells me at least five times a day he loves me.
I don't feel the need to say it but I always reply with i love you too or he feels a little rejected 🤷‍♀️.

It depends on what defines love. Its very easy for my partner to tell me he loves me, and show affection. He has severe ADHD and words and affection come easily to him. What I really need is for him to consider my needs, or even be aware of my needs. I don't even want him to meet them. I just need him to be able to say them. He absolutely cannot follow-up any words with actions.
The problem is that we both define love differently. He takes the "easy" way of loving - words and hugs. I don't want that kind of love, or at least I want it as long as the foundation is built on recognising my needs.