I am so sick of my ex partners behaviour.
We split up 13 years ago when our son was a year old. I helped raise his other two sons who are now in their twenties.
We had a fairly large age gap and I was quite naive and young when we met.
A lot of water has gone under the bridge since we split up, we were on and off for a while before I decided I couldn’t live with him anymore. He could be quite spiteful, unpredictable and said really nasty things to me, for instance the first time our son walked I was so excited (of course) and he scowled at me from behind his computer and mocked me saying ‘you’d think you’d never seen a baby walk before.’
Hes made my life a misery since we split in a myriad of different ways, being absolutely bloody minded and trying to sabotage the relationship I’ve had since. We attended mediation but he is so condescending and impossible to reason with that I left in tears. He’s so creepy that he followed me to my car and was trying to comfort me, rubbing my bare legs as I tried to push him away and drive away.
The worst though is the way he has tried to manipulate the children all these years. He’s the perpetual victim and ‘she kicked me out on a cold winters night with nothing …’ is a folk tale he’s continually told the kids. The older two take no notice and laugh at him, have no respect for him in general but do pity him. He’s always tried to get our son to lie on his behalf tho and emotionally manipulate him in many ways.
Hes always told me that ‘I will always love you and there’s nothing you can do about that.’ In a somewhat aggressive, bullying way. We do occasionally go places with all the kids, like attend football games etc and he’s always staring at me which makes me feel ill.
Recently he came to our house to see our son, and I popped out, and he was snooping around my bedroom! And then asked my son to lie to me about this!!
The middle son is in his twenties and has split up with his partner recently and tried to get some support from his dad, but all his dad wanted to talk about was our break up! He even asked him whether he thought I would ever get back with him or not!? He has asked all the kids this many many times over the last 13 years, and has been told by them (and myself and my family) that it wouldn’t happen in a million years.
I am absolute sick of him thinking we might get back together. He always says ‘never say never though’ and ‘you never know what’s round the corner’ even tho I wouldn’t touch him if he was the last man on this planet. Things are pretty tough for me in many ways at the moment and we also live hundreds of miles away from my ex, so how on earth he thinks we could even get back together is beyond me!Considering things would be so much easier practically speaking for me to get back with him and I still don’t, why he can’t get the hint is just ridiculous!
Any advice about what else I can do??