Is it the guys job to ask?

[Lilllypad11]

My friend and I have been in a slight disagreement since this morning. She likes a guy and has been on 7 or 8 dates with him. She said when they saw each other he asked her when she was next free and she said she was flexible. She later asked him before she got out the car “when are you next free” he told her “I’m not 100% we can just sort it over message”

So she said she’s too nervous to ask him. My response to her was you’re being childish. Just ask him if you want to go out with him again. You’re both adults. Grow up and say when are you next free.

She then got upset and started saying that “men are supposed to be the ones who chase”

I would prefer the man to ask me. Think it's probably because I'd think the ball was in his court and I wouldn't want to sound needy.

If I was getting out the car and we hadn't already organised the next meeting I would assume he wasn't that bothered and his 'im not 100% sure' comment would solidify this for me.

She has asked, he has said they will sort it over message... Id leave it and get on with my life.

i suppose that’s a fair point actually.

Am I missing something?
She asked him, he said he isn't sure & will let her know.
The ball is in his court surely? 🤔
I wouldn't be asking him again until he gets back to me.

Her issue isn't that 'the man should ask' because asking people out is related to owning testicles. Her issue is that this guy isn't bothered, and appears to be taking her for granted. She should write him off and see other people, if she wants someone who is actually keen to spend time with her.

Has he been the one to ask her out the past seven or eight times? Maybe he is hoping she might return the favour.

Basically, in summary. I told her this. I said all it has to be is a simple message. She’s an over thinker. But I said it doesn’t need to be mind games. If you like someone you just gotta go for it.

she said she’s nervous because in the car she said to him “when are you next free” and he said “I’m not 100% sure but it can be sorted by message”

so she’s taken that as the balls in his court. But idk I did say she needs to just be an adult here.

I think the ball is in his court by the way they left it - she did ask about the next time.

Seven or eight times later you might expect she'd to be comfortable enough to ask and then to follow up.

If they're not at that stage is the relationship a bit like too much hard work and likely to hit the rocks soon anyway.

He did ask her first and she didn’t give a better idea, she could of gave a better idea than I’m flexible. Even I’m flexible, how about next Thursday?

I’ve told her to just ask.

Nothing more you can do then if you’ve told her, just leave her to get on with it

You've told her your opinion. She may or may not think on it and change her mind.

It may be that she just isn't than into him (as if she was, she wouldn't leave it all to him to do the running).