Internet relationship help recommendations please! Same old arguments- separation talks-

[Treesnbirds]

Partner and I together 20 years, 4 kids, lots of pressures (same as everyone I guess) He's sick of same old arguments and seems to think maybe this is unusual. Separating has been discussed, I'm pretty sure neither of us want that.

We definitely need help. Can anyone recommend any online relationship help please? I've been looking at Bruce Muzik - his love at first fight courses. Just wondered if anyone has tried it?

Any info gratefully received!

Bump

Has anyone tried online counselling course type help please?

Didn’t do online courses I’m not sure tbh if this would be at first the best route in our situation we both went individually to a therapist … sometimes that’s a really good start a confidential one to one it was over the phone . A lot of therapy can now be done online by phone or face to face . If your having the same old arguments it’s actually not normal and in my opinion this is why
your in a cycle and stuff is not being resolved it just comes up time and time again ( same as what we had) and working in yourselves individually and then as a couple helps break those cycles
best of luck

Thanks so much for your reply. @Yoe So did you then have couples therapy afterwards? Did it work out- if you don't mind me asking?

I think that does sound like a good idea. Thing is I feel like we need help today iykwim - not sure we could make it to waiting for sessions being available. 😕

Tbh both of us had separate therapy it was my first time and you know what I got a lot off my chest . Husband did the same with a separate therapist . Our plan was to go on with couples therapy but we sat down and over a couple of days talked about what we wanted the other to hear and it was really good . Our issue was poor communication not listening to each other ( more my husband not listening to me or my concerns ) .
that was last month only this morning he starting going off on one when I was discussing a concern …. I stopped asked him can he remember what the therapist said about the way he communicates and you know what instead of a fight blowing up he thought about it and calmed down his issue is he gets real defensive if he feels he’s been criticised in anyway but it’s all down to communication for us and also at times he needs a good kick in the arse !!!
seriously I found the one session very good and we didn’t go on to couples counselling . Re yourselves have a look at who is around your area and just book even if your husband doesn’t agree book it for yourself the individual sessions are good as it centres on you not us .
wishing you the best and remember 99% of things can be sorted out but sometimes we need a little help to get there and that’s were therapists come in

@Yoe Thanks so much for your reply. I'm so glad things are improving for you. Sounds similar to us with anything less than praise being taken as huge criticism which is really difficult to navigate, I know it's communication for us too.

This is good advice, I think we will start with that, I've had counselling in the past and it was brilliant. Hope things continue in a better way for you ♥️