I'm 30m and have been with my partner(29f) for 3/4 years now, last year I moved in with her at her parents house. She was away most evenings and as this was a different town to where I was i found myself feeling trapped and lonely. I ended up moving back home as i just didnt feel great, however things still progressed and we carried on making things work but recently we've had conversations about what's next. My view, given past experiences is that we should rent first to make sure the feelings i had before were only due to being in somebody else home however i think she is more inclined to get a mortgage which i feel isnt a good option for a couple not married.
We went out for drinks on Saturday and the whole night she was off, i kept checking to make sure she was alright but got nothing from her. It wasnt until a couple of hours later she told me that she thinks we're at different places and she has been thinking this for 4 weeks now in terms of living arrangements and whats next. Am i wrong to feel concerned she's been thinking about this for 4 weeks and hasnt approached me to discuss and even more so me sensing something is wrong and her not opening up about it.
Are there too many red flags, are we fighting a losing battle. Should we give it a go or are we delaying the inevitable?