Would you leave or would you stay ?

[Dietcokeornothing]

DP and I have been together a long time - 12 years this November. We have one DC 8.

This past year we’ve really grown apart, partly due to him taking on a very very hectic job. Out almost 10 hours a day then emails/ phone calls in the evening. He says no time/ headspace for him to do much else.

He did a very different job when we first met, he changed careers when our DC was born and I just don’t feel like this is what I’ve signed up for. I am very lonely in the evenings, our sex life is dwindling as he’s just never here, or he’s constantly on the phone when he is home. I feel invisible.

I would really love another baby, however time in not on my side, I love him very much and I don’t doubt he loves me. But I don’t want another baby feeling like this. It would also break my heart to separate and completely change DCs life.

has anyone been through anything similar? Would you stay and put up with the current situation? Or would you attempt to leave?

Hi OP, my honest answer is I would do neither of those options initially at least.

I wouldn’t put up with that, but I also wouldn’t attempt to leave- at least in first instance if you truly do believe that you love each other. I love my husband completely and if he was to come to me and express the unhappiness that you are over our lives/situation, I’d be more than willing to engage in any kind of change necessary to fix things and I know my husband would be exactly the same if it was the other way around.

Communicate, therapy, effort, dedicate time … if he’s not willing to do those things then he doesn’t love you like you think he does and at that point I’d be packing up to leave.