Escorts and other numbers blocked on phone

[Helpamamaout24]

Recently, I had issues with husband over sharing responsibilities and not pulling his weight. We sorted it out after a long silence. During this phase, I decided to look through phone due to the amount of time he is spending on it. I took a screenshot of blocked contacts on whats app, as my suspicions where all over the place.

Ive literally not had any time to check but this morning I decided to look at it and discovered two phone numbers blocked for escort agencies from Netherlands. Husband was there 3 months ago over night on work trip.

I approached in a calm manor and he denied anything and advised he was curious, was looking at porn and local adds came up, he was just curious and clicked on adds but swears he didn't follow through. Im sick to my stomach all day. Ive said I dont believe him, too coincidental for two numbers and will get a PI to investigate for me further until I get answers. I have no idea why I said this and doubt I can get a PI.

Ive also seen another two phone numbers blocked, one which I see is belonging to a girl not too far away, which I could find through google search on her phone number as her business details showed up, it is def not some spam. The other I cannot trace but rings and girl answers. I can’t be certain who these are, but part of me needs to know where these other encounters. Right now, I need evidence to leave him as he will deny deny deny again.
For context, we are expecting another baby, we have a daughter together and recently built a new property on my parents property and all our finances are tied into this which is concerning me about how I would be able to retain the property without selling due to my family ties.

The trust is completely gone when you are checking his phone to this extent.
You may be best to get good legal advice re the property and financial situation.

I need evidence to leave him as he will deny deny deny again.

You do not need evidence. It makes no legal difference (in E&W, may vary in other jurisdictions). He will continue to deny no matter what, you could catch him in the act and he’ll have an excuse or an explanation.

Take it from someone who has been there: this is the evidence. You’ve found it. You know what’s happening. You just, totally understandably, don’t want to believe it.

I need evidence to leave him as he will deny deny deny again.

Why do women always say this? You don't need anything and you have ALL the information you need to get rid of this man. Your husband is disgusting and he's lying to you. You know this. Tell everyone what he's done and kick him out.

Thanks to those above for your advice. Live in England and today I am looking into separation etc and getting my finances in order here and how to move forward as I know it can be different across the UK.

Hi Op, I’m going through something similar, minus being pregnant and my house being on my parents land.

When I first met my husband he absolutely adored me and put me on a pedestal. On reflection I think he was love bombing me. After our first DC was born he didn’t really pull his weight but it was a lot better than after our second DC was born. He did buggar all, was grumpy, rude, swore at me etc. It progressively got worse, until he was spending loads of time away with “work” (we work for the same company so I knew this was bollocks) or because “I didn’t want him around”. I only found out he’d been to Cornwall, when he bought gifts for the DC, but he” drove there and back in a day”, from London, which was a lie he’d stayed in some lodge (found from satnav history) He was running up huge bills on his credit card (which I also used). When I asked for a copy of a statement he said it was hard to get, he eventually sent me an excel download after I tried to download the credit card app on my phone. In January 24 I’d finally had enough and filed for divorce. I was suspicious he was up to something, but thought I don’t care whatever he’s doing as he’s a shit husband and father. Well after this I then became even more suspicious I’d caught him in a lie about a trip he went on, I joined TikTok and found his account, he was following a few escorts, and made comments like “I love you xxx”, I found he’d had an account on adultwork. His single friend that he stayed with whilst in London was also a member and I found the woman he was meant to have been dating on there (DH showed me a picture). I looked through his smart watch (didn’t have long) and found the number of the TikTok escort and another escort. Oh and I also found viagra and vidalista in his glove box. It all made sense what he’d been up to over the last year (or more). As the other posters have said, get legal advice. My DH is very difficult to deal with, so I’m using solicitors. He’s very money oriented and would give me and our DC the bare minimum if he could. Is there anyway you can put money aside? I tried to create a slush fund but all the money went on this credit card (silly me). There’s no point in confronting them, they just lie and/or blame you. Sorry for the long post, this is just a snapshot of what was going on. I’m just amazed I put up with it for so long, but was exhausted with kids, work and no help.

Thanks for your reply. Sorry you had to go through this. Luckily enough I moved to a decent paid job last year, so that gives me assurances and I am a good saver, I have options to take on the mortgage and remortgage in a few years and get funds for him that way.

Husband is adamant he hasn't used escorts or cheating. He handed me his phone for a few hours to look through, unblocked the contacts in question and offered to msg them in front of me, said the two contacts were from a number of years ago that he met online when he was dating before me. He has Provided me with his bank statements etc said he has nothing to hide, but admits he thinks he is addicted to porn for several years now and the rabbit hole of adverts when on porn sites that escorts popped up and he wanted to see pictures etc.

Its so much to take in just now.

He's taking the piss tbh. At the very least, he's phoned those numbers to query (or he wouldn't need to block them). That's enough to leave him regardless if he paid for services or not.

Decent people don't phone prostitutes. Let alone when they are married.

Get your ducks in a row.
You don't need any proof anything else. He's admitted bad enough stuff already to make you run for the hills.

Leave him .iv dealt with this for 10 years it's left me with anxiety and Deppresion .mines done it online n chatted to escorts!! I'm currently building up the courage to end it as iv no attraction or trust just my feelings have died !! I'm happy to be single at my age now they don't change I let him off 6 times

Escorts don't advertise on pop ups from porn sites; most porn sites are hosted in the US where prostitution is illegal. Also - escort directories don't need to advertise.

You don't need "proof".