How do you politely refuse an invitation to something boring?

[ShrubRose]

I have a new friend whom I like a lot and hope to get to know better. We've been to a few activities. But she's invited me to some things that I am just not interested in. A couple of times I faked a prior appointment, but she sort of knows my routine, and I'm not sure I can keep doing that.

Now I've gotten myself into the position of agreeing to something that I wouldn't ordinarily do on a day when the weather forecast is horrible.
When I invite someone to a specific thing, I do it carefully, i.e., "I don't know if this would interest you ... " But she just sort of says, "Are you free on Sunday? I'd love it if you could join me for ..."
Is there a way to say you don't want to do something without being insulting or alienating?
TIA

To take the situation away from you personally,@ShrubRose , do you feel that friends in general should all have the same interests? Do you feel that people should make excuses when they don't want to do something?

She's not wrong though is she?

Just say "No thanks, I don't fancy that sorry". Why lie?

Neither. I just say It's kind of you to invite me but it's not my type of thing.

To clarify, lyings wrong. You're not supposed to lie.

"Thanks for thinking of me but it's not my thing, have fun and we can catch up another time."

Definitely only needs a simple “that’s not really my type of thing, but I’d love to go for lunch/a walk/insert anything else you would do together, if you’re free on x date”. Then she knows you’re not just avoiding spending time with her but just that specific invite doesn’t interest you.

I’ve definitely got better at saying this as I’ve got older.

No thank you, I don't fancy that.

Another who agrees with @Watchkeys and I think every posters since.

@YireosDodeAver and @perfectcolourfound have explained it well.

It's just bizarre to be making things up / lying when you can simply say that it's not for you.

I just say the truth. ‘Doing x when it’s raining just makes me cold and miserable sorry.’ ‘Actually you could not have known this but I hate x with the fire of a thousand suns. If I were getting married and on my wedding day my new husband asked if I could spend 10 minutes at x I think I’d need an anullment’
be honest, make it about you. Might help to suggest something else for another time instead, so think of things you do like.

These responses are helpful - I normally say "god no, I can't stand musicals". Or whatever it is. But it often does seem to be musicals. People seem to think everyone loves them, but I like plays. And operas. But not musicals.

It’s not really my bag Sandra
Ah, I won’t Julie, but enjoy
I’ve got some things to do this weekend, Brenda but thanks.
She doesn’t know everything about you and you don’t need to apologise / fib or feel awkward for not wanting to do stuff.

It doesn’t matter what you do or don’t do that you might be busy or not at all busy with. If you don’t want to do something, you don’t need an excuse to avoid it. Alternatively, Sunday morning could be your protected chill time with coffee and papers /book, who knows. Point is, you choose what you do - and you need boundaries so that you don’t end up doing stuff you don’t want to do. It’s the beauty of being an adult 😊 don’t waste it!

“No” is a like a muscle - the more you practise using it, the easier it gets.

Not do polite but I have a friend who loves to do all sorts of things and I've been known to reply with fuck no, that sounds awful!

It's fine to say no to things you don't want to do, no excuse needed.

Try not giving a reason.

'Sorry I can't do Sunday but I'm free on Friday if you fancy a coffee?'

'I'd love to catch up but I'm busy on Sunday. Are you free for a walk on Tuesday?'

This⬆ it needs to be your automatic response!
When she says 'what are you doing' you're not obligated to tell her, as if she were your superior at work or something.
Spin a little and say, sorry I'm not free, or sorry it wouldnt be my thing.
Or 'it's so kind of you to think of me but fuck off I'm not free/sorry it wouldn't be my thing'.