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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Advice please

6 replies

Chars25 · 16/03/2024 20:53

Hey… so basically me and my husband been together 5 years. He is down on our council tenancy agreement. I don’t want to be with him anymore but he refuses to leave. Basically we both have 2 children from previous relationships and one together, he will do anything for his older 2 kids (16&12) if I ask him to pick our 4 year old up for hour cause I’m at work it’s a problem. We have his kids one night in week and every other weekend. He is self employed and doesn’t always have work or sometimes chooses not to. He does nothing in the house whilst I’m at work. Can’t remember the last time he said anything nice to me, just constantly puts me down. He is so jealous of me it’s weird. I am getting a new car from work and he is seriously jealous, if i see or speak to my family “they are all I care about” he wakes up sometimes and just decides he doesn’t want to talk then expects me to just be ok when he wants to be and I am sick of it now. I avoid going on nights out cause I just get abuse and get told stay out it’s better when ya not here and nobody want you here. I can’t do it anymore but I’m stuck as he will not leave. What can I do, it’s so depressing now. Not fair on my kids to live in a house with atmosphere. I can never afford to do nothing with my kids as can’t afford to pay for 7 of us

OP posts:
Chars25 · 16/03/2024 21:17

Can anyone advise what I can do to move forward please?

OP posts:
Opentooffers · 16/03/2024 21:24

Pay for 4? You should not be paying for him and his DC's anyway. You will have to talk to your landlord about the lease. Are you both on it or just your H? If both on it ether discuss transfer just to your H or give notice and find somewhere else to live.

Chars25 · 17/03/2024 08:55

Opentooffers · 16/03/2024 21:24

Pay for 4? You should not be paying for him and his DC's anyway. You will have to talk to your landlord about the lease. Are you both on it or just your H? If both on it ether discuss transfer just to your H or give notice and find somewhere else to live.

Hi it is a council property and we are both on it. I cannot afford to go private rented. His mum has 2 spare bedrooms so he has somewhere to go but choosing not to leave.

OP posts:
NewDogOwner · 19/07/2024 22:57

Yes. Husband took a £50,000 loan and we are just about to finish paying it back 10 years later.

yhk · 19/07/2024 23:41

It'd probably end up having to go to court if he is unwilling to leave. He has as much of a right to live there as you do.

All you can do is speak to your council's housing office and see what they say.

Omgblueskys · 29/07/2024 08:32

Please talk to housing officer explain relationship has broken down and you need to be rehoused as he is refusing to move out, they will try to rehouse you whilst supporting you , good luck, 👍

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