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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is it me?

27 replies

travelmadmum23 · 13/03/2024 15:21

My B/SIL is driving me and hubby absolutely nuts!

For many, many years, they have kind of "copied" what we have done or said we want to do, etc.. Sounds mad, but it was things like if we said we were planning a trip to Northern Scotland to do the NC500, suddenly they would do it... That kind of thing. We ignored it until covid hit, and then everything just went pete tong.

I started a business, very niche.. Only 1 other business in the city did this particular service.. Within 3 months, she started up the very same business! When questioned, she said she didn't know I'd started the business up, which is complete lies. Then, there have been instances of her buying tickets to concerts that we are going to or booking holidays to places we have been, we bought a car in Oct, suddenly they need a car in Nov! I got my hair dyed half copper (dip dye), and she got hers half red... Exact same style but in a different colour. I had my nails done in red with reindeer for Christmas. She got the same design but shimmery red instead of glittery red. We had booked a landscaper to do our garden and suddenly 2 weeks later, low and behold they are doing their garden!

We have now stopped telling anybody what we are planning or what we have done, we don't post on Facebook, etc. We feel like everything we do or plan to do, they copy, and its driving me absolutely crazy.

Am I crazy? It's really starting to freak me out a bit, tbh and it's causing issues within the further family. We had arranged to go and visit an aunt in another part of the country, BIL, then asks if they could come on that same day as they wanted to see her on that date! It was a random date we selected around work commitments.... nothing special such as a birthday, etc.

Hubby & I have massively distanced ourselves over the last few years, but it's still happening. Always a competition for mothers Day or Christmas, who buys the best gifts for the in laws etc and I just can't cope with it anymore.

OP posts:
Loubelle70 · 13/03/2024 16:44

MonsteraMama · 13/03/2024 16:23

Calm down Miss Marple, don't you have anything better to do than trawl through people's posting history to try and "gotcha" them with something that's actually irrelevant to the thread they're posting?

OP the only thing you can do about behaviour like this is completely ignore it, or have fun with it. I'm thinking bald cap and a "oh I shaved my head for charity!", I'm thinking fake tattoos, I'm thinking plans to sell your new car and buy you and your husband His & Hers blue and pink Vespas. See how far they'll go.

🤣.... Best way. Pretend to do the shittiest cringiest stuff youd never do...put it out there.

travelmadmum23 · 13/03/2024 16:46

DrunkenElephant · 13/03/2024 16:40

@FunnyFinch what is your problem?

You constantly rip OP’s apart, you did it yesterday and then “bowed out” when people pointed out you had misunderstood the original post.

Going back through previous threads to catch posters out is weird behaviour, are you just deliberately trying to be a dick?

It's no secret that I have issues with my MIL and SIL which has been mentioned on here previously. My thread today is apart of that wider issue and a major contributing factor to the friction. My cleaning business isn't the business in question. Because my business is niche, I wont post it as it could be identified. If other posters want to gain an opinion that I'm the problem - that's ok - it's a public forum.

I'm not sure how all the occasions over the years could be coincidences but perhaps she has insecurities and I shouldn't take it so personally. I came here to vent really and I wish I hadn't bothered. MN can be so toxic

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