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Why am I so weak around this friend?

1 reply

AyzumSkayzum · 11/03/2024 09:24

I use the word friend broadly here, because we're not really, not any more. But really I just want to know what other people would do in this situation?

So friend, lets call her Jo, and I met about 15 years ago when we were late teens/early 20s. She was teaching a class of a very niche hobby, think a martial art. But very uncommon, only a few teachers in the UK outside of London, very close knit community. I took the class, found that I was quite good at it, got fast tracked to several competitions etc, really hit it off with Jo. We became quite close, hanging out a lot outside of hobby.

Somehow, the friendship soured. Nothing too specific, but Jo became very domineering, almost bullying of me. I pulled back a little but stayed in contac),t because this hobby is very important to me. There is nowhere else I can go to practice it. However, things have cine to a head now, and she's made some very snide comments about my kids (comparing them unfavourably to hers), and I am angry. If she was only a friend I would immediately end the friendship. But this hobby is very important to me, it's the one thing I have outside of being a mother that makes me feel like me. Great for my physical and mental health, and there are still competitions I do. A break with Jo would meet I was out of this community.

What would you do?

OP posts:
sesquipedalian · 11/03/2024 11:08

I’d carry on doing my hobby and be polite to this woman and treat her like any other teacher. If she makes unfavourable remarks about your children, tell her you don’t appreciate it and that it’s unprofessional of her when she’s a teacher as well as a friend. Do your class, be friendly but as you would be to any other teacher of an adult class - and don’t let her comments get to you.

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