Struggling with bleak future

[Fawklight]

Hi all,
I just wanted to get things out of my head and wanted other people's views.

Right now I am not living with my husband, I'm living with my mum, dad and a Ukrainian family (Who are wonderful). I have my two year old with me and I'm 16 weeks pregnant.

My husband has had anxiety for years. He went through a rough patch 7ish years ago where he couldn't function. It comes out like the world war 1 veterans. Lots of thrashing, unable to stand ect. And now it's happening again. I left for my child. I didn't want him to be exposed to that as it's very frightening. The crisis team in our area also advised me to leave for my wellbeing and my son's wellbeing.

At this time I'm trying to live day to day, I've been here at my parents house just under a week and we are living in one room. I know I can't live in one room forever.

Quite recently I had my mother in law messaging me telling me I should be there supporting him. I told her what was going on, that I need to support my son. She said tough that's what marriage is about piling guilt on me.

So now I'm stuck. I want to be there for my son, and I'm drowning in guilt.

I don't really know what I'm looking for. I just wanted to get it out.

Ignore totally what his DM says. His mother quite possibly put a man, or men, ahead of your DH when he was growing up and his MH state is a reflection of the childhood he had as a result. She is definitely not someone to take advice from unless you want your DC's to become messed up adults too.
You are putting your DC's first. If the intent is to return once his episode is over, don't consider having more DC's, it's not fair on them to have a father with such poor MH. Take time to consider if his MH is such that its safer for you and DC's to stay separated.
Whatever happens, you have an example in front of you of how bleak a future some people have, you are not living in a war zone and have family support around you. Take strength from how your lovely Ukrainian family are keeping on, things can be a lot worse in life. Starting again on your home turf with family and friends around already gives you a head start.

You are absolutely doing the right thing. Hold firm in the confidence in your own decision. Don't answer calls to MIL again. Block her number.

You seem to have used your child's name in the post? You should ask MN to edit that out for you.

@Opentooffers thank you, both his parents put others before their kids. His dad chose his younger half sister over his wellbeing as well. The history and were it comes from is there for him to see.

I try to hide my pain from our Ukrainian friends because I feel so selfish for feeling sad.

I'm actually getting my tubes done after this one is born. More for my own health. I've bled with both pregnancies and I personally can't take the stress of pregnancy again. I thought it was because my first was a complex.