What are your ‘good man’ dating signals and

[Cassidyscircus]

Aside from the usual polite to service staff, nice to their mum, punctual stuff?

I’ve just fairly recently got out of a horrible 6 month relationship where he did a spectacular bait and switch and in general turned out to be a bit of a monster. He was very charming initially and after 4 months he started picking on me for everything, and vanished for Christmas before trying to get back in touch on New Year’s Day. I’m proud of myself for ending it early, in the past I’d have stuck around another couple of years.

Then I went on a few dates with what was seemingly a very nice man, but he casually dropped in a time where he had embarrassed ‘a bitch’ in his work to the point that she cried. Obviously I’m not seeing him again.

I want to date but I’m getting fed up of the aggressive behaviour surfacing once they’re comfortable

*sorry I can’t edit the title

Sounds like you've got it about right. You're spotting all the things that don't sit right with you. You can't know what a nice person they are (or not) until you get to know them. So keep on as you are and date them until they do something that clashes with your moral code. And if they don't then ... great.

We can't help falling for/how we feel about someone, whether or not they're an arsehole. The trick is to not stick around the minute you realise they're an arsehole, no matter how much in love with them you've fallen.

Happy to take things slowly. Genuinely interested in you as a person. Has a good relationship with exes/mother of his children. Is consistent and reliable. Isn’t desperate to be in a relationship. Good at listening. Thoughtful. No addictions.