Can you help me out of limmerance

[Helenopolis]

I'm struggling with limmerance and I hope some rational mumsnetters can snap me out of it. I know some people dismiss the idea of limmerance but honestly this feels so much more than just a crush and it's ruining my life.

I am married with young DC. DH is wonderful and kind, but honestly we are struggling with the relentlessness of work and family life - lack of quality time together means we have neglected our marriage and I know this is probably the main reason why I feel how I do.

The subject of my limmerance is someone I have had reason to interact with fairly regularly over the last 6 months. However this is about to stop, he is leaving and as our interactions have been entirely professional, this will be the end of it. I'm gutted, feel stupidly "heartbroken" and lost at the prospect of never speaking or seeing him again. It's pathetic, and if DH felt like this about someone else I really would be distraught. To be clear, I would never act on this feelings. I just want them to go away and feel normal again. Does anyone have any (hopefully kind) words of encouragement for getting over this?

I had this madness when I was in my early 40s and looking back, I think I must have been perimenopausal because I went through the menopause at 48. I was absolutely obsessed with this particular man, my every waking thought was consumed by him. It was bloody awful and lasted about a year before I cut all contact and stopped behaving like a lovelorn teenager.

You've been given some really good advice on this thread, I hope you are okay.

Much like your own posts then.
Here we are in a conversation disagreeing with each other which is fine. Hope you're ok.

@PoochiesPinkEars

I just don't like the pot calling the kettle black.

Hope you're ok, too, sweetie. Unless you were being passive aggressive?

I sympathise. It’s absolutely awful.

I experienced it last year to the point where my thoughts were constantly consumed by this other person.

I am also married with DC.

After 8-9 months of trying to ignore it I eventually told them how I was feeling and that I couldn’t be friends with them anymore.

I went complete no contact and it was really hard but o knew that if I didn’t do something then things were just going to escalate further.

After 6 months we started re-integrating into each other’s life ago and we are now at a point where our friendship is back on track and I have firm boundaries about how we spend time together to make sure I don’t go down that road again.

I am very sorry to hear of your loss and the awful experience that you had.

Blimey how self obsessed do I have to be to not stop and properly take in your post @AmaryllisChorus and say how very sorry I am you went through all that

Oh it's fine. It was years ago. I worked out at the time that it was somehow connected with losing the baby. But only recently discovered it is frequently connected with bereavement.