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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

To wonder if there is something wrong with me

2 replies

Healthyhappymama · 05/03/2024 17:46

In general I believe I am a very good person. I like seeing others succeed and be happy and im kind. I'm a loving and a genuine person. I probably lack self esteem and confidence, on the whole not very ballsy but at the same time I don't take any shit.

My whole life I seem to get in with some dodgy people, or is it me?
I was brought up by a very strict , physically violent lady who in the end turned the whole family against me. It was not me in the wrong, but she stuck up for this person ( in the wrong) and lied to the whole family. I was thrown out the family. They all turned against me and they got away with it, I was made out to be the bad one.. I was left to get on as a 14 year old. I then went to stay with a friend, her parent made my life a misery and in the end they all fell out with me even my friend group. But I still got on. I then met a man who was very abusive, constantly belittling me, physically and emotionally abusive, but yet hes got away with it with family members looking down on me. I managed to get away 10 years later. I then met another man who treats me respectful but is never present to our children and his mother is one of these sneaky manipulate control freaks Of course makes me out to be the bad one .Is there something wrong with me that I get treated like this ? Or is something wrong with others?? Maybe I'm too soft?

I do get on with a lot of other people .But certain people Ive mentioned made my life hell!!!

Sorry if it's long and boring

OP posts:
zippingalongslowly · 05/03/2024 20:16

Often people who've had difficult family relationships growing up have difficult relationships as adults. It can be that not having experienced healthy/happy relationships growing up, you may tolerate behaviour that others wouldn't. Have you ever had therapy to work through your experiences as a child and relationships as an adult? It can be really helpful.

Healthyhappymama · 05/03/2024 20:35

zippingalongslowly · 05/03/2024 20:16

Often people who've had difficult family relationships growing up have difficult relationships as adults. It can be that not having experienced healthy/happy relationships growing up, you may tolerate behaviour that others wouldn't. Have you ever had therapy to work through your experiences as a child and relationships as an adult? It can be really helpful.

Thank you for your reply, it makes perfect sense. Thinking of it I do put up with a lot of terrible behaviour and let it continue and forgive Perhaps therapy might be useful. Thank you

OP posts:
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