Jealous work colleagues

[seemedancing]

I've never experienced this in my working or private life but for the first time, I've been afraid of showing parts of myself that I want to celebrate - birthdays, holidays etc.

I know it shouldn't bother me/work is work/I'm there to work but it feels like a one way relationship.

I celebrate their wins, listen to them, congratulate them and I get snide comments.

My brother is getting married this year and one of my colleagues is involved in the industry. She said something nasty about potentially something happening so that the wedding couldn't take place with a smirk.

Would you find a new job? Anyone experienced this?

I haven't, but I have had toxic colleagues before, and just left as soon as I could. Life's too short.

I've never experienced this in my working or private life but for the first time, I've been afraid of showing parts of myself that I want to celebrate - birthdays, holidays etc

When you're afraid to show parts of yourself because you're worried about how it will be used/received/commented on - you're working with toxic people and the only solution is get out.

Been there and done that. It's horrible.

Yes I would get out as fast as I could and I would tell my manager why on the day I left.

I would have called her out on it. Well aren't you a little Ray of sunshine.
As for leaving. It depends on how much this happens, how easy it will be to find a new job and most importantly how important a job is for you and your family.

I’m unclear about what the wedding industry colleague actually said — you said ‘My brother’s getting married in Venue X his summer’ and your colleague said ‘Let’s hope X doesn’t close down, as I hear it’s in trouble’/ ‘unless World War III happens’?

Sorry, posted too soon. I could see envy of your own accomplishments/treats etc being possible, but surely having a sibling get married isn’t unusual or enviable, and isn’t really to do with you, anyway?

I'm really looking forward to the wedding/I am close with my brother.

You have my sympathy...

The situation / your response to it says something is REALLY off.
the only explanation i can think of is toxic work environment or bad fit.

Is it everyone or just this one person who id like this?

If its more than 1 person I'd probably start shopping around for a new job quietly...hopefully there are jobs going in your sector.

My current team are toxic there is only one other "normal human" on the team...they hate it as much as me and it makes it more bearable but it does grind you down.

And that’s lovely, but I’m not seeing where jealousy could come from in this instance. Is this person just gloomy and defaults to the worst possible scenario in all situations? Which I agree is depressing in someone you share workspace with.

Just stop sharing stuff, and definitely stop congratulating their wins and oohing about their holidays or whatever. Or beat them at their own game.

Colleague: ‘I’m looking forward to my sandwich!’
OP: ‘I heard three people in Accounts got ill after eating from there.’

Colleague: ‘I’ve just booked a holiday in X!’
OP: ‘I was there last year. It was a rubble-strewn building site full of drunk yobs.’

I'd get a new job. Life's just too short to waste with miserable people who bring you down.

I bet if you leave your only regret will be not doing it sooner.

Onwards. Upwards. Happier.

What has your brother getting married got to do with work? How are they jealous of that?

This.
If someone I work with said their sibling was getting married I would think '..ok?' and wonder why they were telling me.
Wouldn't care one iota about colleagues holidays or birthday, I'd just say a cursory 'happy birthday/have a nice time' and never think of it again.
They're just colleagues, not friends.

This happened to a relative of mine who is a medical professional working in an environment where she was the most senior/had the most authority, with people twice her age who were in unskilled/low skilled roles (think doctor vs receptionist).

The jealousy and spite was off the scale. She couldn’t talk about anything. She used to pretend she was taking annual leave to relax at home instead of telling people she was going on holiday. She had to lie about which school her son went to. Etc etc. You get the picture.

Anyway, she ended up being signed off for stress/anxiety and leaving the job.

It’s an awful situation to be in.