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Relationships

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Ideas of ways to spend time together in evening - rather than just TV

22 replies

GreenSippyCup77 · 22/02/2024 13:20

Me and my husband have been struggling with our relationship the past couple of years, since having our first DS. I won’t go too much into the details but we’re in a reasonably good place at the mo. He recently made a comment that watching TV together is supposed to be the lowest form of intimacy. I understand where he’s coming from. Once DS is in bed and we actually have some time together, all we seem to do is watch whatever series we happen to be watching. Not much chance for proper conversation or bonding. I’d really like to try and strengthen our bond and make the most of our alone time and it seems he would too! Just wondering if anyone has any ideas or advice of what we could do instead of TV? Dinners out would be lovely but we have limited people nearby for babysitting so these are only once in a while/for special occasions.

Some thoughts I’ve already had:
Playing board games (any suggestions of good ones?)
yoga - we did this together through an app during lockdown and enjoyed it!
Kareoke
Conversation starters - I’ve seen you can get cards online for this, though not sure if dh might find them a bit naff 😅

Like I say, any other fun ideas or activities anyone’s tried that have helped you reconnect with your partner, would be truly appreciated!

OP posts:
NeverTrustAPoliceman · 22/02/2024 13:38

Board games.
Do some sort of craft project together, eg mosaic splashback for a hand basin.
Research and plan some days out or holidays.

Inextremis · 22/02/2024 13:43

Get one of those murder mystery kits - we're working on one at the moment - you get various bits of evidence and website links to research and find more clues - it's a lot of fun. This is ours.

RosesAndHellebores · 22/02/2024 13:48

DH and I often read the same book, not at the same time, we pick up totally different things from it. Choosing some music to listen to?

We are rarely in the same room together and never watch TV together. We do follow the news and discuss it though.

Could you have a special meal once a week?

What are your joint interests?

The fact you both have time to sit and watch TV together is a bonus in itself. Can you use the time to talk or do other things that come naturally?

snowlady4 · 22/02/2024 13:51

Playing cards.
Scrabble.
Learn a new game- dominoes.
Nintendo switch or other console.
Cook/bake/make cocktails.
Go to bed!

UnbelievableLie · 22/02/2024 13:56

I think lots of great ideas suggested so far. We try to do different things on each evening. So one might be movie night (or TV show binge), one is cooking a more complex meal together, another would be playing a game. We try to have a loose plan on what we're doing and trying to keep it interesting!

Starlight1979 · 22/02/2024 14:21

Sorry to state the obvious but... sex??? When me and DP have no plans and the house to ourselves then we're in bed at 8 with a bottle of wine! A few hours of intimacy and chatting in between does the world of good. Especially if your relationship has been struggling as you say yours has OP....

NoFunNoFrills · 22/02/2024 14:26

Starlight1979 · 22/02/2024 14:21

Sorry to state the obvious but... sex??? When me and DP have no plans and the house to ourselves then we're in bed at 8 with a bottle of wine! A few hours of intimacy and chatting in between does the world of good. Especially if your relationship has been struggling as you say yours has OP....

Edited

Sounds lovely, but I can imagine doing this. Sex is normally over in a few minutes 🤣 I feel like I need to learn some secrets (or maybe DH does), we're clearly doing something wrong

Muddywalks34 · 22/02/2024 16:38

I agree with the poster that says to take a bottle of wine up to bed, we often do this and it’s one of my favourite things to do, my girls are teens now and if they have weekend plans we will sometimes do this on an afternoon too when we have the house to ourselves, nothing better on a grotty grey winters day than snuggling up in bed with hubby and a bottle of wine (or 2)

other things are cooking a meal together, music on and a bit of a dance around the kitchen

my husband plays the guitar so sometimes we will have a bit of a sing song

I am not a huge fan of games or anything like that but will occasionally have a game of pool or darts (we made a home pub/games room during lockdown)

we are always wanting to do bits to the house so sometimes we just sit and plan, look online for ideas and things

alwaysmovingforwards · 22/02/2024 18:36

Erotic cosplay?

Sparklyhat · 22/02/2024 19:20

Gaming? Sometimes DH plays through a game and I watch (eg one with a good storyline and your choices affect the ending sort of thing)
Or we play together (minecraft)
Cooking together? Sometimes cook something a bit more special than normal after our young kids are in bed, then light a candle and sit at the table (don't usually do this day to day)
That's all we really do together in the evenings besides watching a series

JumalanTerve · 22/02/2024 19:37

Board games are great for this

clareykb · 22/02/2024 19:46

We have been doing some lego together with wine which I get sounds really geeky but is actually quite relaxing

Hummusanddipdip · 22/02/2024 19:51

Similar to what's already been suggested:
Lego
Jigsaw puzzles
Board games
Dh plays the guitar, we play a game where I try to guess the song he's playing, bonus if I can sing the song 🤣
Our eldest ds is obsessed with dinosaurs, so we draw them for him to colour in, occasionally adding silly details to entertain ourselves
Sometimes we just sit in the same room doing different things (me reading, him gaming)

mrssunshinexxx · 22/02/2024 19:54

We both love music so take it in turns to put some on Spotify and other has to guess artist and siong name .
Jigsaws
Card games
Baking

mrssunshinexxx · 22/02/2024 19:55

In summer we take baby monitor out and do gardening and our next door neighbours have an out door pool table so play that ( monitor reaches)

DGPP · 22/02/2024 19:57

Is your husband hinting at more sex? Sounds like it!

Twoshoesnewshoes · 22/02/2024 19:58

We play board games and drink beer
recommend-
carcasonne
everdell (our current favourite)
pandemic
wing span

MillshakePickle · 22/02/2024 20:05

Boardgames for us (both of us okay, collect and sell) we currently have over 150 games and are trying to narrow it down.

Depends on heavy or long a game you want plus they can be £££

We like

Brass Birmingham
Ark Nova
Dune Imperium
Clash of Cultures
Castles of Burgundy
KHORA
Zhanguo
Whitechapel
Navigador
Twilight struggle

Some light and easy breezy ones are

Babylonia
Agricola Big Box all Creatures great and Small
Bunny kingdom
Lost Cities
Race to El Dorado
Pax Pamir
Cascadia
Water gate
Fall of Rome

Most of these can be played with more than 2 players, some are 2 player games. The games above all play well at 2 players.

There's apps available to track your games and scores. We are both very competitive and enjoy the banter and the unwind time together. Some games can be a bit of a mind bending experience but we love hashing it out.

If we're not playing games, we are planning holidays, going through the family budgets, doing DIY, might watch a particular series together but won't watch more than an episode an evening and usually after we've played something. We spend time doing online shopping together for everything g from gorceries to sex toys. We bake and cook together and some times we just grab a coffee and a snack and hang out chatting shit no TV or music on. Just us and the kids in the bed.

HelpMePleaseeee · 22/02/2024 20:23

DP and I have started doing pub quizzes together from YouTube. Each only take like 20 mins. So nerdy but we enjoy it 😂

terfinthewild · 22/02/2024 20:40

Give him a blow job if you don't want to have sex.... it's relatively easy and he will be so happy after.

livelovelough24 · 22/02/2024 21:15

Well, since he is the one complaining, I would say ask him to make suggestions. I personally agree with @DGPP , he is not thinking board games, he is thinking sex. 100%!

Sufac · 22/02/2024 21:20

Romantic dinner when the children are in bed? We often do this on a Friday and Saturday. Then sit and chat after, listen or play music, play cards.

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