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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Covert narcissist rage at me

6 replies

thesleepyhoglet · 20/02/2024 19:29

Hello,
I really just need a handhold tonight as I write this feeling quite sad but holding back the tears until my DD is asleep.

I've been with my husband for ten years and whilst he hasn't changed that much, I've changed and begun to realise why he is like he is.

He has a very horrific mother who has treated him and his siblings badly. She would email them and tell them they are disappointments etc. she isn't nice. Unfortunately, I've realised he is the way he is because of her. He cannot take responsibility for anything and if asked a simple question he will automatically assume he is being criticized and become defensive and quite nasty. Probably linked to this he will also never apologise (because that means accepting responsibility). He swears really badly around the children, especially in the car to the extent that my daughter worries if he is giving a lift to one of her friends. Recently he's been taking to refusing asking questions. She asked him what he was up to yesterday afternoon when her sibling was at a play date and he told her "you have no right to ask me that!"

Living with him is hard. He doesn't clean for example unless asked directly even though I work 60hrs a week and he works 30hrs. The other day I asked him to clean the hall- hoover and wipe down the skirting and window sill. He did such a crap job that I still don't know if he did it like that on purpose. But he always makes it so he's the victim Eg don't do anything so is asked translated to being nagged. Do it but do it badly so it has to be done again by someone else.

Im so on edge around him because one minute he is passive aggressive and answering questions with "I can't remember" or "I don't know" but this evening he flew off the rage in a narcassisitc manner saying I am turning our daughter against him. He was screaming about how much money I needed to give him to get him to leave etc. Ive never said I want him to leave. Whilst screaming at me, she was curled up on a chair crying. How can he not see the irony of this. I've managed to perk her up and get her emotional regulated again but it's so upsetting that he can't see how unwell he is.

I will probably have a proper cry later but somehow needed to get it all down.

OP posts:
Maray1967 · 20/02/2024 19:32

I’m surprised that you’ve not told him you want him to leave. You need to. His behaviour is very damaging to your DD.

I’m very sorry but he needs to go.

EG94 · 20/02/2024 19:35

alarming read as a lot of it resonates with me. Outside looking in, I’d say leave know your worth, don’t tolerate it but I’m putting up with the same shit. Not easy to leave. Think it’s called a trauma bond.

itsmyp4rty · 20/02/2024 19:35

This needs to end OP, this is no way for a child to live. If he's always been like this why have you stayed with him for 10 years? It really doesn't matter why he's like this, he's not a riddle for you to solve.

thesleepyhoglet · 20/02/2024 19:42

itsmyp4rty · 20/02/2024 19:35

This needs to end OP, this is no way for a child to live. If he's always been like this why have you stayed with him for 10 years? It really doesn't matter why he's like this, he's not a riddle for you to solve.

I know, I know

I didn't realise for many years that he was treating me badly. His mother used to send me abusive emails etc and I stayed in contact but about 2 years ago I went totally non contact with her. I advised him to as well eat before and said how unkind she was to me, but he just couldn't. Ive become more confident and chilled since I have nothing to do with her!

I was a different person when I met him. I was much younger and vulnerable. I didn't drive, didn't have a career, doubted my appearance etc. He is quite a lot older. At first, I thought I could help him. I didn't understand narcissism. I just feel really confused-does he genuinly think I'm a narcissist? I think he's been angrier because since having my eyes opened I just distanced myself (as much as possible from him).

He told me to pull myself together when I was suicidal. I'm not anymore and it was related to PND, but seeing the way he treated me then was really eye opening!

I do feel really really sad for him as I still think there is a great person in there somewhere, but his upbringing has really damaged him. Not to say those who are brought up by narcissists are like him, but he doesn't have the self awareness to understand himself. It's so painful.

OP posts:
thesleepyhoglet · 20/02/2024 19:44

Also, I think if we were split up, she would be more vulnerable. I think he is jealous of the fact that I have my own hobbies and friends now, whereas he cannot make or sustain friendships or perhaps doesn't want to. I actually don't know. I know we will divorce, it's just a matter of when.

OP posts:
NeverDropYourMooncup · 20/02/2024 19:48

Nah, he's just a common or garden abusive prick - abusing you and your daughter.

Your life would improve immeasurably if you got shot of him right now.

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