Cannot see eye to eye - counselling? Over?

[Peppanotaparty]

So DH and I have been together for around 7 years. 2 kids, all the usual life stresses.

We both work, he earns more as I work around the kids pick ups drop offs childcare etc.

How I feel:
that we aren’t a partnership. Feel like I can’t ask for money if I’m short, can’t ask for more help around the house, can’t mention if I’m feeling ill etc. just feel like I get no understanding whatsoever/get told to deal with it I’m an adult.

how he feels:
that our sex life is dead and I don’t care about our relationship. He feels like this because I might say no to sex after a long day at work, chasing the kids around trying to get them to and from school/dinner/bed etc do washing/cooking/homework.

honestly I’m exhausted and he just doesn’t see it. He suggested counselling earlier but I really don’t think it will change his ability to see/understand/care about my point of view.

Sorry it’s a bit rambly lots going round my head lol

A few questions:

Is there a reason you don’t pool money as a family, seeing as you have children? How has it been decided the financial split works? These lead to - why exactly do you feel you can’t ask for money?
What happens if you request he does more around his home?
What happens when he is ill versus you are ill?
What happens when you say just how weary you are is effectively putting sexual intimacy on hold?

And finally…do you feel you both respect each other as individuals, equally?

If you really think and answer them honestly (to yourself not the ether) I think you’ll know the answer that’s right.

Why need to ask help around the house. Does he not live the same house? He has no responsibility?!

why can’t mention if you ill?? If you unwell then you unwell and he got to step up to keep household functioning no??

more background might help us give better comment thanks!

Go and shame his sorry little ass