Relationships with bisexual men

[ToBeOrNotToBee]

Has anyone had relationships with bisexual men before. Would you mind telling me your stories (NC if you feel more comfortable).
Essentially, I'm falling for a man who I knew from the get go is bi. It doesn't turn me off sexually, but I do wonder if I'll ever be 'enough' if that makes sense.

Why does it matter? If someone is into you, they're into you. If they want someone else, they're probably not for you. It's not like 'Bisexual men usually need to touch a willy within about 6 months of a straight relationship.'

Grow up? If you get into a relationship with him and feel he's interested in others, leave.

My only experience is probably a bit of an outlier. But basically he told me he was bi and that was fine and I was rather taken by him. But as the dates went along...I realised as cute as I found him...he didn't seem to fancy me. Not only that but I actually got this weird instinct that he was repulsed! Even though he was gentlemanly and always wanted another date. I just could shake the feeling.

It made me paranoid that there was something on my face or I smelled or something xD

It was like, I wanted to cuddle up a little on one of the dates for example and I felt like there was a 'don't you dare' barrier coming from him preventing it. As if I was picking it up from his body language even though it seemed relatively open.

So I ended up after date 4 just being like 'I can't tell if you like me, you're hard to read' and he messaged back that actually he really liked me. But then the very next day he messaged to say actually he didn't.

Now I could be wrong but...I actually think he was gay and that's why I got the vibe I did off him. I've never had that from a guy before (I mean I've had plenty clearly not into me, but this was totally different). It wasn't even an anxious nervousness either, it was straight up 'don't touch me' vibe.

Maybe he was looking for a beard?

Plenty of normal bi guys out there but after my odd experience I'd just say watch out for signs that they are genuinely attracted to you. Because although that guy said all the right things and we got along really well...my gut told me something was really wrong.

I don't think he was intending me any harm but...nor am I repulsive (I hope lol) so... I think he was gay and lying to himself.

Apparently there are people like that out there. Even in their late 20s, still in denial.

Hopefully he's not one of them! Certainly don't want to contribute to bi erasure ir anything like that. But just drawing your attention to my weird experience just in the off chance you experience similar and wonder wtf is going on.

My (hopefully soon to be ex) husband is bi, he's always been honest about that and it was never an issue for me. He was engaged to a woman before he met me, and when they split up he was in a relationship with a man for a while. Most of his relationships/sexual encounters have been with women though, with a handful of men thrown in.
If anything there were some positive aspects to his sexuality, for instance he loves shopping and has an excellent eye for clothes and outfits and makeup. 😊 He's also quite a feminist and doesn't really get on with any 'lads' who speak degradingly about women.

Our marriage coming to an end has nothing to do with his sexuality, if anything I wish he was gay now and would bugger off with a man, would make everything a lot simpler.
But in brief, some people are genuinely bisexual and not closet gays, for them it's about the person, not their sex.

My DH is bi, we have been together for nearly 20 years, married for 15. He had had long term relationships and casual relationships with both men and women before me.
I dont really know what to say except we have a nice relationship. And just like my previous relationships have very little baring on our marriage, neither do his.
Sexually things are normal, periods of feast and periods of famine. I have never felt, or been made to feel lacking in anyway.
He recently 'came out' to our three children who could not have been less interested! Which is typical in my experience of children hearing about their parents before they were born.
All told we have a very happy marriage and my DH's sexuality has never caused a problem. I have however been gobsmacked by other people's very judgmental attitudes. And giving blood used to be a pain in the arse for me but they have changed that now.

Total non issue, why would it be? (Other than you are having sex with someone who has in the past has probably had higher risk sex than a straight man, but then you'd want to keep yourself safe whoever you are having sex with).

Speaking as a bi woman, I don't see the problem here. There is no higher risk of it not working out than there is for a couple where both are straight.

I’m a bi woman and I’m perfectly happy with my DH. I don’t feel like I’m going without because I’ve only had sex with a man for the last decade. I’m no more likely to cheat with a woman than a man.

There seems to be a common misconception that bisexual people are just greedy and can’t be monogamous. It isn’t true. Although, I do understand there is more stigma around bi men than women.

I'm a bi woman and have had relationships with bi women and bi men (as well as straight men and lesbian women)

It's a thing that often gets brought up, and I actually think it's pretty biphobic.

It's never made any difference to me what sex/gender my partner is, I have liked that specific person, and I have never wanted someone else just because they're a different sex or gender to my current partner. I have also never felt that a bi partner was sizing me up in that way and judging me as "not enough".

If someone likes you, they like you. If you agree that the relationship is monogamous, a respectful partner will stick to that (or whatever mutually agreed relationship boundaries you have).

If someone doesn't stick to the agreed relationship boundaries, they're a cheat. It's got nothing to do with being bi and plenty to do with not having great ethics or self control.

Yes, potentially, the person you might theoretically get cheated on with could be any gender. But that's not really the point, is it? The point is your partner cheated, regardless of who with. Bi people have exactly the same likelihood of being a cheating arsehole, no more and no less than anyone else.

I think you should be a bit careful and have a very opened mind if you want to take this further.

I know 2 bisexual men, and both of them always revert back to having meaningful relationships with men, as opposed to very short-lived relationships with women.

Perhaps as someone mentioned above, they’re closet gays.

Personally from my observations (and of course I might be wrong) it’s like the men want to periodically test the waters just in case.