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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I’m struggling to know whether or not to cut these people out

21 replies

Lilllypad11 · 12/02/2024 19:09

We all went out on Friday. I’m closer to Emma than I am to jenny. But we all stayed out for a while. Anyway, I ended up having a big old cry about being cheated on after having way to much to drink and suddenly I just start telling my life story. Anyway, I also stupidly said I don’t like my new manager. We were all similarly drunk and they were drunk and c*ked up but I reckon these guys remember my nonsense.

they carried on going out, I had to tap out because I had too much and after crying couldn’t be bothered to go out.

Bur what upset me was Emma knew I was pretty upset that night and she didn’t think to text me on the day after to say did you get in safe or are you okay from last night or anyyyyything. Today I walk into work and apparently before I got in manager said “have you heard off tess” and jenny said “no not a word” “but then suddenly you started walking in and went you’re alive! ”

I was a bit annoyed. I just said hah yeah. And sat in my usual place. I just had nothing to say. She later tapped me on the shoulder and said “oi you okay?” I said “yeah I’m fine. Just got my period”

OP posts:
friendswiththemonstera · 12/02/2024 19:11

Do you work with them? Why would you cut them out? If you don't find her a supportive friend then invest more in friendships with supportive people. No need to cut someone out.

Lilllypad11 · 12/02/2024 19:12

friendswiththemonstera · 12/02/2024 19:11

Do you work with them? Why would you cut them out? If you don't find her a supportive friend then invest more in friendships with supportive people. No need to cut someone out.

I meant more “phase out” keep at a fair distance. Sorry. Cut out was a bit blunt.

OP posts:
Snuggleyou · 12/02/2024 19:18

Lilllypad11 · 12/02/2024 19:09

We all went out on Friday. I’m closer to Emma than I am to jenny. But we all stayed out for a while. Anyway, I ended up having a big old cry about being cheated on after having way to much to drink and suddenly I just start telling my life story. Anyway, I also stupidly said I don’t like my new manager. We were all similarly drunk and they were drunk and c*ked up but I reckon these guys remember my nonsense.

they carried on going out, I had to tap out because I had too much and after crying couldn’t be bothered to go out.

Bur what upset me was Emma knew I was pretty upset that night and she didn’t think to text me on the day after to say did you get in safe or are you okay from last night or anyyyyything. Today I walk into work and apparently before I got in manager said “have you heard off tess” and jenny said “no not a word” “but then suddenly you started walking in and went you’re alive! ”

I was a bit annoyed. I just said hah yeah. And sat in my usual place. I just had nothing to say. She later tapped me on the shoulder and said “oi you okay?” I said “yeah I’m fine. Just got my period”

Call me thick but who’s “Tess”

friendswiththemonstera · 12/02/2024 19:19

That's really up to you. It's hard to tell just from this whether she is a supportive friend generally and whether you are a supportive friend to her. If you feel it's too one sided then focus on other friends and keep her as a drinking buddy.

Lilllypad11 · 12/02/2024 19:22

Snuggleyou · 12/02/2024 19:18

Call me thick but who’s “Tess”

Me. I’m tess.

OP posts:
Snuggleyou · 12/02/2024 19:23

Ah ok

MrsPerfect12 · 12/02/2024 19:26

No, maybe they don't even remember or thought you'd be a bit mortified so left it.

Ladyj84 · 12/02/2024 19:27

Erm sounds like you all drank to much. Move on

Moier · 12/02/2024 19:29

This sounds like teenage girls at a youth club.

Ilovemyshed · 12/02/2024 19:34

None of this makes any rational sense whatsoever. Are you in a playground?

FUBAR77 · 12/02/2024 19:41

Yes YABU. What you say and what you do is sooo less important to the others as it is to you. Don’t sweat it!

themusingsofaninsomniac · 12/02/2024 19:58

You sound about 15.

EmotionalSupportAutie · 13/02/2024 00:10

Work on your boundaries.
And why on earth are you announcing your period to your manager? Not v professional

Bearintheredhat · 13/02/2024 00:13

Ah, the fun that is half term.

aitchteeaitch · 13/02/2024 00:17
Confused
Aquamarine1029 · 13/02/2024 00:24

Emma's not your mother, although you do sound as though you're 14.

LoyalMember · 13/02/2024 08:46

You sound way too high maintenance and needy.

Z0rr0 · 13/02/2024 08:57

I'm reading female gender identity here.

Lilllypad11 · 13/02/2024 17:29

Bearintheredhat · 13/02/2024 00:13

Ah, the fun that is half term.

What’s this meant to mean?

OP posts:
Lilllypad11 · 13/02/2024 21:29

aitchteeaitch · 13/02/2024 00:17

Confused

Yeah?

OP posts:
aitchteeaitch · 14/02/2024 13:59

Lilllypad11 · 13/02/2024 21:29

Yeah?

Yeah what?

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