Internet dating...

[PersephonePomegranate]

As a 40 something really is the pits, isn't it?

I've recently dipped my toe in the water and by God, its depressing. I'm a widow, so my last relationship ended voluntarily and was very happy. I think I'd rather die alone 😢

Don't bother. It's the dregs.

Seriously getting that impression!

Omg I meant to say my last relationship didn't end voluntarily!!

It's left me feeling worse than ever On the one hand but grateful to have had my lovely DP for as long as I did!

It’s even worse as a 50 something 🤦‍♀️

Unless you’re into flabby pasty faced men wearing hi viz staring blankly taking a selfie at arms length and giving off Norman Bates vibes. If in a moment of madness you match with these prime catches, expect the communication skills of a monosyllabic 12 year old boy coupled with sleazy sexual ‘banter’ within minutes and compliments like ‘u have grate tits lol lol lol’

Yep it’s a real joy 🤣

Is it really that bad? I was thinking of having a look in the future. After all how do you find men Anymore?

Don't give up! I've met a really nice/decent guy and can this lasting a while. Spoke to so many dick heads in the beginning though....

There are some gems between the dross, but they are few and far between.

Is it really that bad? I was thinking of having a look in the future. After all how do you find men Anymore?

So far, so bad. Pretty much as @SamW98 describes.

I have no idea how you meet anyone any more. Hiding behind a screen seems to have destroyed any social skills that were ever in existence.

Glad to see some people have had some luck though, I expect it takes persistence. I don't know if I have the energy for it all!

Honestly.., I wouldn’t bother with that age range. It genuinely is all the dregs, I’ve been on and off online dating for 12 years and any of the short term ish relationships ive had from there have all been with men who are not over their ex wives/feel guilty about their kids/have financial problems as they are supporting their ex/kids household whilst keeping a roof over their own heads/only after sex/emotionally damaged the list goes on!

The problem with online dating is that it's accessible - anyone bored and with a phone can join, and they're usually as lazy as the amount of effort needed to make a profile (next to zero).
I'm a man and briefly tried it in my 20s before meeting my now-DW; it was absolutely dire.
Absolutely full of dull women wanting top earners with a fast car whilst they don't drive and have nothing to offer in return - but I imagine it's the same the other way around too.
If they seemed half-decent they'd go 'quiet' after a few weeks, most likely because one of the 20+ people they're speaking to has snapped them up.
It's very much a numbers game, so if this isn't for you (it's certainly not for me) then I'd look elsewhere.

I'd go and join a club and meet people that way - it's much easier to 'gauge' people in real life rather than on a screen.

You do stuff, rather than sitting looking at a screen.

I do stuff. But I have a child and a job and let me tell you I’ve never met a man out running that’s even spoken to me or out walking my
dog.

Its just not that simple I think people are afraid to connect now with the worry of how it will be perceived

@Championfancy

Let me tell you: you'll have to do some other stuff, then.

It hasn't been that simple for you. Yet. But that doesn't mean that 'it' isn't that simple. It means it takes longer for some people than others. There's no way you can tell me that lots of happy, healthy relationships haven't started between people who were doing stuff rather than sitting at a computer, so your own personal experience is just that: one voice in millions. It's not evidence of anything except where you are at. Going running and walking a dog aren't really 'doing stuff', either, not in the way that people 'do stuff' to meet people. They're solitary activities. No wonder it hasn't worked.

I really have no idea anymore. I tried OLD as a last resort as despite being very social and out all the time, I literally don’t meet anyone new and single.

Im happy with my life so meeting someone isn’t a massive priority but there’s so few older men out there who are suitable.

I’m a Widow and met a Widower through online dating. He is amazing and we are both so happy together. We are moving in together shortly so yes there are good men out there

@Givemejellytotts that's lovely! Wishing you both every happiness.

I met by DP on there after going through a tonne of weirdos sending dick pics and asking me for nudes! Been together 4 years and planning on getting married once my children are a bit older! Don’t give up …but maybe join friendship groups for over 40’s / 50’s maybe a less pressured environment and also men more likely to be “normal” and behave like gents! Good luck it must be so hard to lose the love of your life 💔