When mutual friends think your ex is wonderful after treating you so badly at the end

[SEW77]

I took a step back from a group when we broke up, really to avoid having anything to do with him. He said some really hurtful things to me and I didn't want to be his 'friend' after the horrible way he discarded me.

I didn't tell this group what happened or badmouth him in any way.

I know they think he's a great, outgoing, fun guy. I'm getting on with my life and I'm over him now, but every so often I feel a bit down about this.

Can anyone relate?

I think you need to let it go. Most people take others at face value and don't want to get dragged into taking sides in a break up.

If you have taken a step away from them I'd keep it that way and not dwell on what they think of him. It's irrelevant.

Thank you. Yes, I know it's irrelevant- I suppose my self-esteem is still a bit low after the belittling at times during tbe relationship, hence feeling like this at times.

I felt like this at one stage, I felt like I'd lost out. However, I also realised I was trying to cling to these mutual friends to remain a connection with him. I took up a new activity and met new people through this. I understand how you feel though.

I was in an abusive relationship and mu own family did not believe me. I have found it hard to forgive them, not only the way it affected me but my dcs.

Unfortunately you have to forgive and move on but don't forget, remember who can trust and who you can't trust.