Better to apply for divorce alone, or do it as a joint application?

[Lorenta]

Is it better to apply for a divorce on your own, or to do a joint application with your husband/wife?

If I were to apply on my own, and basically impose it on him, he would feel that his pride is wounded and I think he might retaliate.

If we do a joint application, it would feel more cooperative. But I think he might also refuse to cooperate if he got angry about something.

As a related question, I was also wondering if anyone could point me towards some good guidance about the process. I have been looking at the Gov.uk page. I can't really afford legal advice, but wouldn't qualify for legal aid.

Thank you.

Does he want to divorce too? Have you agreed finances or arrangements for the children?

Sorry, should have said I have not said anything about divorce to him.

He wouldn't want it.

We haven't been married that long and we have no kids.

..... but I guess the question is, should I give him the option of doing it as a joint application (even though he doesn't want the divorce to happen?)

I’m not sure that you can do a joint application ? I would say it’s best for you to do it so you’ve got control over the process. But you need to tell him.

Solicitor here.
I find the joint application a real faff compared to a sole application. It's much more cumbersome. All my colleagues/friends say the same.

You start the application and he's invited to join it. If he joins it but doesn't agree the marriage has broken down it turns into a sole application (he cannot defend it except if he challenges jurisdiction). If he ignores it then again you turn it into a sole application.

If you can prove he's received the sole application but is ignoring it you can still progress it.

Takes about 7 months from start to finish. After the initial issue/acknowledgement there's a "cooling off" period of 20 weeks during which you can't progress it.

It sounds to me like you'd be better to pursue a sole application. Government guide here -

www.gov.uk/divorce/before-you-apply

It is never a good idea to do together, even if you legally can. Once you let him know you want a divorce, he will no longer be your pal. You need to protect yourself. Additionally, I recommend getting all of the financial info you need before you say anything. Pension information, bank accounts, investments, bills, etc. Might not even be a bad idea to open a separate account and put half of the money in it. You never know what someone will do when confronted with a divorce, especially if they had no idea it was coming. Protect yourself.

@TooTrusting I hope you don’t mind me jumping on this thread.

my worser half won’t agree either and will try every which way to stop it (I’ve been married 9ver 20 years and twice separated- it’s a very long story)

i own a house but I know he is entitled to a share. How is this communicated to him what he wants to do/ how he agrees to divide the assets ? Do I need his address or will his email address suffice?

i would appreciate any scrap help will be gratefully received.

thanks

The financial split is separate to the divorce itself. You can get divorced without a financial order.
I think you need his address but the divorce application is served by email. You could probably make some sort of application but it's probably cheaper to get a tracing agent to find him.
To get the ball rolling with a financial split you need to email him to suggest a timetable for disclosure and you can make an offer at any stage. If he's going to stonewall, after the divorce is issued you can issue a financial application too. That sets a court timetable in motion which he can't ignore.