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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Sunday

9 replies

Penelopedear · 28/01/2024 21:27

Today, my children woke up, we had breakfast around the table, they relaxed in a warm clean house playing before lunch and then breezy walk on beach with dog. Home to supper, bath and story before bed. Nothing out of the ordinary and our lives aren’t perfect. Husband left for OW five years ago although they do see him EOW BUT it is night and day difference to my childhood where I didn’t know what I was wakening up to on a Sunday morn - drunks in living room, drugs on the floor of which I was terrified of my younger siblings getting, parents not so much, hungover adults everywhere. Police calling, more alcohol throughout the day. Drugs being taken upstairs whilst children were in living room. Dirty house, no structure to the day. This is not a pity party, I realise my parents needed help but having children has made me realise how much I had to battle to stay afloat as a young child and it’s so upsetting at times.

OP posts:
ArnieLinson · 28/01/2024 21:29

Sounds like you provided your children with a loving and calm day.

HowDoTheyGetThroughLife · 28/01/2024 21:31

You're certainly a better mother than your own one was. x

Penelopedear · 28/01/2024 21:31

I know - thank you and I hope to be able to do that for as long as possible. Just feel deep sadness sometimes about how scared I must have felt as a child. Have to bury it in RL though as no one speaks of it and drinking continues in family despite me having an aversion to alcohol pretty much.

OP posts:
NuffSaidSam · 28/01/2024 21:31

You've broken the cycle. Well done. If more people could do this the world would be an infinitely better place.

Penelopedear · 28/01/2024 21:32

It can be a lonely place breaking a cycle but thank you ❤️

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dotdotdotdash · 28/01/2024 21:34

Sounds like you are doing a great job with your family. I recommend her all the time but the Crappy Childhood Fairy is such a brilliant help for anyone looking to heal from a hard upbringing.

Penelopedear · 28/01/2024 21:35

Thank you, haven’t heard of this before and will definitely take a look x

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Xccccc · 28/01/2024 21:46

You are your children's hero and everything that is good in their world. You aren't alone , you stand with all the other single mums who fight to give their children a good life despite having not family support. I've had a nice Sunday doing my best to give my kids a warm secure home but I've struggled a bit today with the weight of being the only dependable parent. Your post has given me strength to be their rock.

Penelopedear · 28/01/2024 21:49

Thank you and well done to you too. Your children are very lucky to have you to depend on. I know what is like to have the opposite. It is hard to be the dependable one all the time but it’s so important and we can rest in the knowledge that our children feel safe and secure and so should we! I think the child in me is still so frightened sometimes. X

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