I am utterly fed up with DH. Been married for over 5 years and together for over 10. We have one DD aged 2 and we both said we want another one but he doesn't seem to appreciate we need to try (see more details later). I also realised we have grown apart and another child might be what I want but not what's right for the relationship. Few examples below and I would really appreciate some comments as I feel like I am going crazy creating unnecessary issues and fighting the urge to become single mum
- DH is really weird about work and keeps saying I don't respect his job (for context I work 4 days plus sometimes evenings when DD is in bed, he is full time but I earn over double his salary even with my part time hours) . He would not compromise work, ie his share of nursery pick up and drop offs are when it suits him, usually less than half of the time. I am expected to be flexible as he says I have an office job, which is not demanding.
- He won't accept that life goes on when you have a cold, eg he wouldn't do anything as a family for two weeks in a run up to him working away as he had to be in a top top condition for that work trip. He wouldn't help me with potty training as he said weekends are for chilling
- He is a massive football fan (would watch football on average half of the evenings, 3-4 hrs Saturday and Sunday). When his team plays I am expected to take care of the toddler, ideally take her out of the house or upstairs, otherwise he comments he is missing in the game. He says football is his only hobby and I should respect that. My life is basically planning nice things to do with DD like museums, classes etc so I don't have to face him on the sofa watching football
- This is me growing in a different direction but I feel DH lacks zest for life and ambition. He never comes up with ideas of doing new things, if we go somewhere like a new town at the weekend it's always for him to do work research at the same time. He hates doing things he is uncomfortable with, eg would not take DD swimming as he doesn't know where to go ie changing rooms etc and what to do (!). I feel he is really restricting our family life.
- We decided over a year ago we want to try for another child. Few months in I got pregnant but had miscarriage (not first one). I am getting treatment for recurrent miscarriages and been advised to try meds etc to speed things up. This means the clinic tells us 2-3 days to have sex following my scan and injections. However DH is very ironic when I tell him when the right time is. He also wouldn't take time off to attend the clinic with me (I apparently don't understand his job and he cannot book holiday week in advance). Goes without saying I got zero support when I had miscarriages to the point I had to take taxi to hospital when bleeding was bad as he needed sleep before work next day.