Should l leave him

[gallgirl]

I have been with my partner for 12 years. He has become more domineering and moody as the years have gone by. He criticises everything l do saying he doesn't know how l get by in life. He has in the past got credit cards in my name without my knowledge. Nothing l do is good enough. He has punched a door and thrown a plate at the TV recently. He shouts and slams doors and tells me off in public. Is this normal? as he can be nice too.

Not normal, and no amount of nice makes up for disrespecting, scaring, and stealing from you. These situations only ever get worse not better. Be brave and protect yourself!

No, that's not normal and you deserve better than a moody man baby that financially abuses you.

Time to step up and value your own worth.

This is not normal and dread to think how it might escalate in the future. Get your affairs in order and go x

No its not normal ,it's the opposite of a loving relationship.
Being 'nice' once in a while does not compensate , i would leave life is too short .

No, not normal and yes, you need to leave ASAP.

His bad behaviour does not balance out his 'good' behaviour. He is a liar, a thief and violent. Run like the wind.

Hes abusive. It might feel hard to leave now but I promise its worth it. Womans aid really helped me

Yes, LTB. Mine criticised everything I did and it erodes your self esteem. Wish I had left years ago.

Not normal, and you need to leave.

You are at risk and he is escalating his behaviour. Make a plan, safeguard yourself and go - never look back!

I feel trapped l don't have enough money to leave.

What is your situation at the moment OP? Do you have children, a mortgage or renting, working or SAHM etc?

Am renting. I work full time. I have a 25 year old son at home who doesn't work for medical reasons, he is not my partners son. The rent in my area is far too expensive for me to afford on my own. Feel very trapped.

Have you spoken to the CAB to make sure you are getting all the benefits you could be entitled to and to see what help there is to get out of an abusive relationship?

You will be entitled to benefits. I assume that you get some for your son.
When you are shopping, add £30 cash back now and again and save it up. Make a plan.
Who's name is the rent in?

The rent is in both our names it's a long term tenancy agreement

Women's Aid will help you, they did me. They will support you and have all the info for benefits and help you get on them. They listen and believe you, I couldn't recommend them enough. I hope you are able to get out of the situation xxx

That’s not normal OP but you know that in your heart. He is abusive and you need to seek support and specialist advice about breaking free
Have you checked your eligibility for benefits , would your son stay with you - his housing needs etc are relevant. Is he also affected by your H?

Yes, it would absolutely leave. No way I would be treated like this.

Yes my son is very much affected by my partner too

You can do this. Make a plan and work through it one step at a time and you will get there. Good luck OP, it will be worth it xx

Because he got loans and credit cards in my name l have bad credit. I won't even be able to rent privatly this is why l feel trapped

I really feel for you OP. Please take advice from CAB or Women’s Aid as they can help you make a plan to escape. They will have seen women in your situation many times before. Good luck

You need professional advice.