Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Eccentric/ASD mum

33 replies

Tiredboymum22 · 25/01/2024 00:08

Did anyone else grow up with neurodivergent or eccentric parents?

I’m interested in other people’s experiences growing up and whether it was anything like my childhood?

OP posts:
Earthworms · 25/01/2024 23:28

I genuinely can’t wrap my head around why I should wear clothes that are less comfortable because other people prefer to look at them. I open my mouth and words fall out and people get upset but often I really don’t know why.

Wow. Was just checking i hadn’t posted this earlier by accident! So true.

2024GarlicCloves · 25/01/2024 23:58

Mum - way too old to be diagnosed, but did once agree with me that she may have Asperger's.

Always very hot on nutrition; I now realise she's orthorexic (and I had anorexia). Other kids highly amused by my healthy lunches of brown bread, peanut butter & salad, home-made yoghurt, etc. In the 1960s a normal kid's lunch was Dairylea slices, white bread, crisps and a Penguin. We ate muesli before it was even available in the UK. She doesn't understand why the rest of us choose pleasurable foods.

Has an unfailing talent for saying the wrong thing. Words come out and she's so obviously being nice, it just baffles people. Dreadful facial recognition: bounds up to strangers and looks confused at people she knows.

Creative and eccentric. I love this about her now, but teenagers are not best pleased with a parent in sparkly purple, fringed outfits while all the other mums are in tailored beige & pastels. My 'made by Mum' school costumes were always weird, too. Teachers appreciated her innovative ideas, the other kids and I just thought I looked like a freak 😳

Executive dysfunction in spades. Always late, in a panic, starts huge projects with no sense of how long they'll take, cannot abandon a project once started (I've inherited this).

Wonderful sense of adventure, little sense of safety. It's astonishing that we all survived - with multiple broken bones - and escaped extremely threatening situations relatively unharmed.

No emotional filter. Family life was a constant maelstrom. This wasn't helped by that fact that my dad was a sadistic psychopath (I suspect diagnosed). Mum loved him and was unable to separate that from his blindingly obvious faults. On the plus side, she loved us unconditionally too.

My brother and I have cautiously agreed that we do show clear signs of ND ourselves. We won't bother getting diagnosed at this late stage, either. Our somewhat dysfunctional coping strategies will have to do. Neither of us is as batty as Mum ... but when people meet the whole family together, they invariably find us odd!

justdontknowwhat2doo · 26/01/2024 00:44

definitely can identify with lots on this thread. All my siblings & our children are ND so I strongly suspect my parents were too.

When I was younger and had no idea about ND I just thought they were eccentric because they had quite wealthy parents who hadn't really parented them (servants/nannies/boarding/finishing school) properly. And they were 'posh' which buys you a lot of Lea-way.

They were also very friendly, intelligent, educated, socialists etc and in lots of ways were great/good parents. But it's only now I'm older and they are safely gone that I can say that!

lovinglaughingliving · 26/01/2024 00:47

SpringleDingle · 25/01/2024 07:12

I’m autistic and I think I might be embarrassing.
I sing a lot (and apparently I am not a good singer!!) and I don’t care about my appearance. I know these things are odd but I genuinely can’t wrap my head around why I should wear clothes that are less comfortable because other people prefer to look at them!
I open my mouth and words fall out and people get upset but often I really don’t know why.
But I am loving and kind, generous to a fault, funny, I cook well, I am organised etc.. My DD knows I am ASD and as the wider family are all a bit odd I hope she sees that my good bits outweigh my singing in the Tesco cheese aisle!

You have just described me!

Tiredboymum22 · 26/01/2024 02:22

@2024GarlicCloves the lunchbox thing is so relateable 😂 I had kids ask me why I was eating bird food as she’d pack me Japanese nuts and crackers from Holland & Barret 😂😂

My sister also had anorexia.

OP posts:
AllTheChaos · 27/01/2024 00:03

Me too, @penjil 😂

AllTheChaos · 27/01/2024 00:04

lovinglaughingliving · 26/01/2024 00:47

You have just described me!

Me too! I am glad there are others out there, too

crackofdoom · 27/01/2024 00:15

I hope my DC won't be too scarred by my parenting. So many of these things ring true. The other day the car radio was playing "Copacabana" as we pulled into the road, and I continued the song- complete with actions- as we got out of the car. Some rather conventional neighbours caught me at it and were laughing at me. It didn't occur to my DC to view it as anything out of the ordinary for me 😆

On a more sombre note, I wish I was more emotionally responsive to them, and better at Talking About the Big Stuff with them.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page