To those in long term happy relationships how did you know it was the one?

[Bluesprinkles12]

For those in long term happy relationships how and after how long did you know you were sure it was the one? Not ‘hoped it might have been’ but 100% completely sure or have you never reached that stage?

I don't know really. Out relationship moved quickly and had lots of stress at the very beginning. It was how he dealt with that really that made me realise who he was.

He was just always very supportive and kind (and fit). We got pregnant 5 months into our relationship and he was great about it. Sent me money every month (we lived apart at the time because of the logistics) etc.

He supports me and the kids and would drop everything for us.

I chose very very carefully.
I took no prisoners and tested him to the limit to make sure.
Probably a year into the relationship I was satisfied that he was good enough.

I had absolutely no qualms about fucking him off immediately he did anything not up to scratch.

He grew on me by just being himself, honest, kind, thoughtful and devoted.
We were together for 7 years before marrying, 10 years before our first child.

Im a hard faced bitch. It has served me well.

We’d been together about 6 months. There was no drama and no games. He was 100% who he said he was. He always kept his word. Showed up on time whenever we had plans. Was completely supportive of me and my dreams. He had close friends and family who all really genuinely liked him because he was a lovely guy (and still is).

Has it served your partner equally well I wonder.

All of this - exactly the same for me, also.

I knew the night we met. 18 years on and we are still very much in love

First date and he gave me a smile that was just perfect.......yeah I know sorry. 9 years later still together.

Well, we have been together for 30 years.
He is as he was to this day.
A lovely kind individual.

As a foot note, I grew up in severe DV, I knew exactly the relationship I wanted and didn’t want.
The hard faced bitch soon melted away as I grew to live him.

I don't remember a specific feeling like this. It became clear gradually over time. We've been together over 25 years now.

It just felt right, like I had known him before or something.
He isn't perfect and neither am I, but we are perfect for each other.
Together 29 years, married 25

I was not a nice person when I met my husband, but he saw something in me that I could not see. His kindess, his gentleness, his understanding showed me I could be a better person without so much as a raised voice or mean word. He really is one of the good guys. He is my calm place and I cannot imagine us not being together. I hope he feels the same. We have been together 23 years this year.

Met him end of July 2019 never left married end of September and 3 kids on happy happy. He knew I knew.. although little back story we were best friends till 18 and just generally drifted apart due to family circumstances at the time. I looked for him for several years and he me and he eventually found my parents as we had moved a lot and that's how we met again

I felt completely safe with him. I didn't need to pretend to be anyone else, I didn't have to change or contort or conceal anything about myself.

We talked. About everything. From the big stuff (children? How many?) To the little stuff (when to open Christmas presents - before or after lunch?) 🙂 We took things slowly. We were friends first. We had shared values and a similar vision of the future.

He's my biggest cheerleader and wants to see me happy.
We're not perfect. We have different views but similar values. We're different in many ways and we argue but the fact that he loves me and wants to see me happy, helps us to overcome many issues.
So many women are with men who only consider their own happiness. That's never going to work.

In my teens I had quite a few boyfriends some where not awful people but were poor boyfriends, some were selfish and spineless, one was downright abusive and some had other serious issues.

When I met DH at 19 he was just exactly who see seemed to be, he called when he said he would and never let me down. He seemed to be 100% interested in me, not looking over my shoulder at the next possibility as soon as he got me, his focus was on me. He didn't neg me or hurt me. We just clicked and felt very at ease and right together immediately, its a cliché but he felt like home.

The sex was also very good, he was kind of shy and I was his first girlfriend and sexual partner but right away we just clicked in that department as well.

I feel really lucky to have met him and to still be with him now 28 years later and I know he feels the same.

I don't know. We gave up own own places to rent together at 4 months, he proposed at 6 months and married a year after. I think I just felt settled with him. I'd always felt not good enough or like I had to prove something but with DH I just found my contentment. Coming up to 11 years married, three kids - one very poorly as a baby still with additional care needs and twins just on the cusp of the pandemic. Could have broke us but we pulled together and kept going.

This precisely summed it up. I knew where I was and I liked who he was.

20 years in he does frequently annoy fuck out of me but I suspect that’d be true of any man alive and 99% of them more so. My pals always remind me that if I don’t want him there’ll be a queue 😬 Have noticed also that when shit gets tough we tend to go back to the way we were in the beginning, there’s probably something to that.

He was the complete and utter opposite of my ex-husband in every single way! 😄

There were no red flags, we had (and still have) healthy communication, he was (and still is) kind, generous, loving and loyal.

I'd not had this with any other man before.
My DH is just incredible and I could see it in him from the beginning.

Dh decided I was "right" before we'd even dated.
I'm not sure when I realised. Although when he "moved" in with me after our first date, I didn't exactly chuck him out. Been together 24 years now.

It just kind of never stopped. We liked each other's company and there was no reason to end things so it just carried on going. There was no defining, magical moment.

When I met DH I was very disillusioned about men in general - we were very young - both 21 but I had been in a pattern of changing myself to suit my boyfriends. Went out with some right dickheads. I was in a very militant phase after relationships ending at the 3 month point and thought 'fuck it I'm being me' so was 100% warts and all me!

In fact I randomly got upset at the three month point as I was sure he'd break up with me as that was the pattern I was used to.
He was pretty flabbergasted when I told him why as everything was going well! We have always been very straightforward with each other- he hugged me and told me to stop being a so daft!
That was 30 yrs ago and we are still going strong. Married and adult child. I'd say after 3 months I knew he was the one for me! We both fancied each other so much- I 'dragged' him back to my lair on the 1st night we met Love the bones of the snoring bugger up in bed now.

I have social anxiety and am very awkward and shy around most people when I first meet them. I have to really get to know someone to feel comfortable enough to show my real personality but most people write me off as rude/unapproachable before I have the chance to do this. When I first met my DH I was too quiet with him as well. But he just knew without being told that wasn’t what I was really like and was patient with me until felt comfortable enough to be myself with him. So few people give me that chance. I’m also very introverted and usually enjoy alone time. I do enjoy socialising when I’m able to do it but I can only take so much of most people before I have to be alone for a while to ‘recharge’. I think I knew he was the one when I realised he’s the only person I’m happy to be around all the time.