Dating women later in life - anyone else?

[Blueberriesinthesky]

I'm newly separated (from a man) after a long marriage and have realised I want to date women now, not men, after a lifetime of being straight. I'm not sure how I would label myself but perhaps that doesn't matter for now.

Has anyone else been in this position? I'm in my 40s, 2 teenage DC.

You are correct that labels don't matter :)

Are you ok with being 'out' or is your attraction to women something that you want to keep to yourself for now? (No judgement, it can be hard shaking off years of comp het/ internalised homophobia)

If you're not worried about being 'spotted' then all the options are there, OLD, joining lesbian/ bi groups on MeetUp etc

If you aren't quite there yet don't be hard on yourself but do expect a certain wariness from those who don't want to date someone in the closet or someone who wants to 'experiment'. If you are open to dating someone who's in an open relationship try Feeld.

I met my girlfriend (and made some new friends) by going to informal social bi/gay meet ups arranged online and I know a few other couples (also mid 40s and late to the party 😆) who formed the same way. Building a bit of a network of non-hetero friends opens doors you didn't know existed!

Be prepared to travel though if you aren't in a big city, there's not much happening outside those places!

@TasteOfHerCherryChapstick thank you so much for the reply! Really helpful. I am getting more comfortable being ‘out’ and have told people (friends, some family) that I’m looking to date women now.

Tbh I feel a bit strange dating at all as my separation is so new (though a long time coming) and I am scared to go on OLD in general! (I’ve never done it as it wasn’t around when I was young and single). But I am keen to start in some small way - the meet ups sound like a really good idea, thank you.