How annoyed should I be about this?

[NoraLuka]

I really don’t know if I should be cross or not and I’m so tired I’m not thinking straight.

DP went out with friends last night, came home around 3.30 AM, very drunk. Someone dropped him off so he didn’t drive. Tripped over, made loads of noise, woke me up then started snoring like a train. Was kind of talking in his sleep a bit, said fuck you when I tried to get him to stop snoring, at which point I went to sleep on the sofa. ExH was awful for swearing and calling me horrible names so I’m very sensitive to that kind of thing now, can’t stand it at all even when it’s not that bad.

I didn’t really get back to sleep, now working (from home) and DP is behaving as though everything is normal. For context, we don’t have DC together, he used to go out like this a lot but does it much less now.

I don’t even know why I’m posting tbh, just trying to get my thoughts in order.

He probably doesn't remember any of it if he was really drunk.

Have you actually spoken to him about it? There's a good chance he doesn't remember clattering around and he almost definitely won't remember saying fuck you in a drunken sleep.

I've come home after too many thinking I'm being quiet as a mouse. I was not

As for how annoyed you should be, surely it depends if this is a regular thing or not? A one off, have a word but let it go. Every week is very different.

Can’t say with no kids I’d try to police this, unless he does it very regularly, does he? If not then he didn’t intend to be inconsiderate. My husband and I would make sure the other was ok, and let them sleep it off.

As PP says it depends if it's a one off, or becomes a regular thing.

You can talk to him once he's sober and see whether he's sorry or not, but at the very least, if he goes out again, you must insist that HE sleeps on the sofa, so as not to disturb you

Is this your place that he moved into?

Who the hell gets so drunk on a Sunday night?

Do you suspect that underneath he just doesn't like you?

Thank you all for your replies, that’s the way I tend to feel but when I’m tired I tend towards grumpiness and don’t want to start an argument over this! I wouldn’t say it happens often, it used to be weekly at one time but more like every month or two now. He does go out every Friday and Saturday but mostly comes in at a reasonable time and in a reasonable state so that’s okay.

I haven’t spoken to him about it because he’s in zombie mode right now, and no doubt doesn’t remember much! I will have a word later though.

No I moved in with him years ago.

We’re not in the UK, lots of people go out on a Sunday night.

I’m sure he does like me, he also likes his drinking buddies though!

I wouldn't be annoyed about it at all. If it's not a regular occurrence and just the odd mad night out. Why not.
Although I do wonder why some have to get in such a state. DP went out in November for a night out and came home the next day relatively sane.

Honestly, sounds like a non event to me. We've all had one too many and made a bit of noise on occasions.