Deep breath- long post.
My DH and I have been married for 10 years and have one DC. Everything was going along ok until last year new neighbours moved in and put a very ugly extension along our boundary wall. This caused lots of problems, the upshot being that I ended up on ADs.
I want to put an extension on our house to counteract the ugly box that I have to look at every day. My DH keeps changing his mind about this. First of all, when our friends considered buying the next door house he said we may consider an extension at the same time and get it all done at once. This changed to, we can't afford it when our friends decided not to buy. Then, when he found out another friend had an extension done at a very reasonable price, he agreed that I should get an architect round. Now, every time I mention the architect being round etc he clams up and says we can't afford an extension and we've worked hard to cut down our mortgage over the last 10 years and he doesn't want to increase it again. Every time the issue is raised we argue and, having come off ADs at Xmas becuase I was feeling better, I am now feeling bad and weepy again all the time and thinking the -same d-i-v-or-ce thoughts I had at the end of last year which I know is totally irrational over such a small thing.
However, I just can't get over this bloody exension next door and it makes me really down every time I look at it. It has blocked our light and made our back patio really ugly and we can't afford to move as prices in our area are sky high.
DH's feelings I think are all tied up with a stressful job - he can't handle stress, never has, never will, throws up in the morning before work and he keeps thinking he is going to get sacked for negligence. All this clouds his judgement I think along with his experiences as a child when his family were really hard up when his dad lost his job. His father questions everything we spend and had the cheek to tell us a couple of years ago that we shouldn't be buying a kitchen as our (20 year old one) was fine.
Anyway, enough rambling. Just interested in your views- am I being a spoilt brat who is upset as i can't get my own way or is there a fundamental issue with our marriage?