Sorry if you see this post twice. Just didn't see my other one uploaded?
My husband and I have been going through a very rough patch. Context is we have 2 kids married for 9 years and in the past 2 years of my life I've experienced some very rough patches that weren't to do with my marriage but external factors.
Previously I've never had much traumatic events so never seen my husband exposed to having my back but I've come to realise that through these back to back rough events my husband has failed to be there for me. He shuts down and almost walks away. He will put walls up and become emptionally unavailable. He encourages me to seek external support from therapists and friends. It really has caused me to lose so much trust in him and the past 2 years I've distanced myself as i can't really forgive him for this. In my times of need he wasn't there.
I'm on therapy at the moment.
Anyway he hasn't been happy as I'm not my happy old self and he is threatening to leave with my kids. Icing on the cake 🎂 isnt it? Hes been taking them out without me past weekends and won't tell me where he's going as it's apparently none of my business. I'm barred from accompanying him even though my kids thrive with us both there.
I'm kind to him but distant as i feel i need to finish my therapy to get myself in a better place.
I'm very upbeat with my kids so really feel gutted when he does these things.
Now he's taking it a step further and said he is leaving with the kids next weekend overnight and will do this frequently. Is this legally allowed? It makes me feel so unsettled as my kids have never slept away from me and i feel sick to my stomach.
We are on the road to separation but never spoken much about it.
But right now i cannot take much more and him doing this just shows he will never understand what i feel. It's the exact opposite of what i need.
I know people will say seek divorce etc. That will happen. But i need to finish my therapy before i start taking more mental losd on.