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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Should I stay or should I go?

2 replies

Chillichok · 30/12/2023 18:37

Hi, I have been married for four years, with him for eight years. Increasingly, during this year, I've realised that marriage isn't really for me and I'd rather be single.

When I met my husband, I gave up my house and moved into his house, which is in his name only. My money is in an investment which I can't access until September 2026. That money is what was left once I paid off my mortgage. I will probably have enough for a 1 or 2 bedroom house when I can access the money.

I work full-time, but rents have gone up so much that, if I moved out, I would only have about £500 to £600 per month to live on even if I rented the cheapest possible house.

My daughter is a student and depends on my help. She hasn't got anywhere to go in holidays apart from my house. I have also helped her out with money whenever I can.

Do I make the best of things for nearly 3 years or do I leave sooner and hope for the best? Am I being selfish and letting my daughter down if I do leave?

I feel awful that it has to come down to money but I'm already working as hard as I can and I love my daughter so much. Should I stay for her sake?

OP posts:
Csharpminor · 31/12/2023 11:59

Find a flat, one bed with a sleeper couch whatever....you sound like you've made up your mind so go. Life is too short.

Seaoftroubles · 31/12/2023 14:54

I agree, find a small flat, and get a sofa bed for your daughter, I'm sure she will understand. It's pointless and soul destroying trying to struggle on if you've already checked out of the relationship.

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