Ex arrested

[unbelievablescenes]

I've had to report exH for giving my children, who are under 16, cannabis on a regular basis. He's been arrested and is being questioned. My youngest is obsessed by him and has been living with him, she's desperate to go back. Has anyone had experience of this and know what is likely to happen in relation to his contact with my children? Youngest is only 12, thought of sending her back is gut wrenching. It's also going to come out that it was me that reported him and she'll be furious, not sure how to navigate that with damage limitation either 🫣 he will tell her it was me at the first opportunity. Any wisdom welcome on how to keep this show on the road.

What were the contact/living arrangements in place prior to you reporting him? If it can be proven that he's been supplying his underage children with drugs he'll hopefully be spending some time in prison and any contact with your children after that will be via a contact centre.

When she’s older she will understand, as a parent you can’t stand by and not safe guard your own child

He basically used a time I was preoccupied with my other daughter going off the rails thanks to him to brainwash the younger one into living with him full time and integrated her in to his horrendous lifestyle. Which of course at 12 she thinks is a great life. I was able to provide what I hope is decent evidence that he supplies them drugs so praying that there's restrictions on his contact with them 🙏🏼

Good for you unfortunately I don't have advice at that age she will think it's cool she will be angry but your her mum if she was living with dad is she back home with you now if so maybe see the doctor with her as she will have withdrawal symptoms

Could you get psychological help for your dd as the victim of a crime? Maybe through Victim Support

Yeah there was already social work support workers helping her at school as her attendance had gotten so low but they're all on holiday. It's the point when she finds out that I'm flapping about as he's already told her whoever reported him has betrayed 'them', he sees it as an 'us' and 'them' setup which he's projected onto her. He's insidious.

Her and I are still close in the sense there's no bad feeling towards me, she just has this weird attachment thing going on with her dad. It's probably going to make her closer to him and hate me

Surely they'll all juat deny it unless you've got photo/video evidence?

Op with the best off intentions maybe talk to social services and get her back home with you full time I'm no expert but surely even social services wouldn't let her stay with her dad now I know it will be hard but this behaviour is terrible (not you but him) surely school can back you up

Adolescent minds subjected to cannabis is just awful and can lead to all kinds of permanent mental health problems as well as behavioural.

I really feel for you op and I hope something can be done to get the children away from their evil father.

I've got fairly good evidence, so much so they've seen fit to arrest and interview him and raid his house. They found stuff in there too. He really is evil. I will speak to all the relevant people and try my hardest to keep her away from him but they vote with their feet at that age unfortunately. Also only on call people working if anyone so not a lot of info available. Just trying to predict what might happen. He absolutely can't be letting them think smoking weed as a young t(w)een is ok. He's disgusting x