How Often Do You Have A Date Night?

[ChocolateCakeLuver]

Being married 10+ years we don’t have date nights. I’m wondering do couples out there married for around the same amount of years have date nights?

My Dh seems to think we don’t need them!

I would leave. Honestly so dismissive. Life is very short. Don't waste it with someone who doesn't respect you.

We’ve been married 10 years. We haven’t lived near family and had a child with health issues as our first. We’ve had about 4/5 date nights out in those years. However, we spend lots of time together. We run a business together from home and often spend evenings together at home. We’re going to try and fit in a few more daytime ones. However, I don’t think it’s a nightmare as we see each other all the time and chat in the evenings, so it’s not like we have to specifically be out to do that.

Depends what you mean by, do we go out - yes lots, at least every weekend, but kids are grown up (and want to tag along if given the chance) dates though? No we live together, dates are when you first meet someone.

We have no willing known babysitters and don't want to pay anyone external (for various reasons). So we do 'date days' where we take annual leave from work whilst kids are in school and nursery. We do this twice a year.

That’s a lovely idea! My parents did something similar, but they managed to match their time off together. Might consider introducing something like your idea ourselves!

Never. Together 17 years. We don’t ever go out together really, don’t have for time!

I always thought they were for those who needed to “get the spark back”.

Not as often as we would like but working on it. We’ve been together over 20 years. It’s difficult as DD15 has mental health/ behavioural difficulties & can’t be left for too long. She’s not in school so during the day is tricky too.

Married 18 years. We go on date nights about once a fortnight. Usually out for a meal or cinema trip, occasionally bowling and a drink. I think it's important we go out and have fun alone together. We also sometimes do a lunch date if DH works a half day.

Married 40 years +, for the first few years we went out as a couple at least twice a week either for food or to the pub. Then when the kids were little we went out once a week with grandma babysitting (she felt it was important we went out as a couple). Once kids were 14+ we were back to two nights a week until covid struck and we got out of the habit a bit and we now just go out once a week. It sounds like we are right drinkers but DH might have a max of 4 pints and I quite often drive out so drink soft drinks (my choice). Don’t know if they were classed as date nights in todays terminology tho
Theres a phrase, those that play together stay together and we’ve certainly proved that

We don't have date nights we just do stuff together. I think this is th same though? We don't have kids so whenever we want. I understand childcare is hard but no alone time as a couple out of the house feels a bit sad for you as a couple. Then the men wonder why you end up unhappy!

Edited to say been together 19 years, 20 this year.

Date nights - more so 1-2-1 time together not being mummy & daddy and have kids tag along. It can be at home once the kids have gone to bed, have a meal together etc. Just feels like I suggest all this but doesn’t really happen. It’s been about 2years since we last went out ‘alone’ without the kids for a quick lunch.

It actually makes me quiet sad as I feel we’re loosing touch (well I feel he already has) but I slowly am too now. I want to bring the spark back & don’t really know how/what to do.

Will try and work something out so we get even 1 evening/afternoon out every 3months - not asking for much am I 😐

Been married since 1999 and still go out for dinner every three months or so.

Yes that's what we do, take it at the same time. We usually have lunch out together and do something else too like cinema, theatre or exhibition. It's really nice and although it's only twice a year it keeps us going and always have the next one to look forward too.

My ex husband we split last Xmas married 12 years together 15. Never anything together and if we did he was nasty or boring. Anyways he used to say no man would want you go find one etx anyways I did.

Good on you that’s you’ve found someone else & I really hope he treats you well. Your ex was obviously just a nasty piece of work! My partner isn’t far off, seems to be miserable if we ever go too!