How to help him get over me.

[HighlandSpring85]

Recently, within the last few days, split from my DH of 13 years. The split happened after he read some texts from a colleague and he moved out to a friend.
After reflection and some soul searching I have decided that I don't want to continue with the marriage.
He is distraught now and just keeps texting saying he's so sad and wants to cry all the time. I feel bad as he's had to leave and his whole life will change whereas mine won't really apart from the obvious not having him there.
We have a 7 year old, who is fine and knows very little.
I feel fine. I think I have autism so that makes it very hard to know if I'm feeling the right thing.
I don't want to be horrible to him but I do want him to know its over.
He can be angry but not violent.
We have a lot of things to split, two houses and some debt too so don't want to complicate that by making him angry.
Any ideas how to make this better for him? Thanks.

I usually stay away from taking sides. We only have what the OP has said to go on. As a therapist, I work in empathy not sympathy. Blame and gulit usually only prolong difficult situations and are not productive for healing. Apologises if my reply was confusing.. I was trying to highlight that the OP needs to take responsibility for her feelings and her partner take responsibility for his. Apologising for how her actions lead to this is something I did miss, hence the backing up of @JustExistingNotLiving and their advice was more spot on.

Maybe he's not had enough time to process things. He's human not a robot. Despite your diagnosis, in this situation you need to find some patience and empathy for a man who has been cheated on.

He's had to leave as my other two children live here. So there is no option for him to stay.
I just want him to be OK and to not feel sad. I don't know how to tell him I don't want to try without sounding horrible.
I don't know how to respond when he says he's sad without giving him hope. But also not sounding like someone he doesn't know. Obviously I haven't just turned all feelings off for him so don't like appearing cold.
I totally understand that what I did was awful. And that's why I decided to end it, for him.